I'm Starting to Worry about This Black Box of Doom
Bonus paperback content - an excerpt from the new John Dies at the End book, coming in fall 2026! THE INSTANT USA TODAY BESTSELLER A standalone darkly humorous thriller set in modern America's age of anxiety, by New York Times bestselling author Jason Pargin.Outside Los Angeles, a driver pulls up to find a young woman sitting on a large black box. She offers him $200,000 cash to transport her and that box across the country, to Washington, DC. But there are rules: He cannot look inside the box.He cannot ask questions.He cannot tell anyone.They must leave immediately.He must leave all trackable devices behind. As these eccentric misfits hit the road, rumors spread on social media that the box is part of a carefully orchestrated terror attack intended to plunge the USA into civil war. The truth promises to be even stranger, and may change how you see the world.
The Marionette
Bestselling and beloved author Terry Fallis' tenth novel, The Marionette, introduces readers to a new hero, James Norval: a world-famous thriller writer whose life takes an unexpected turn from the pages of his novels into the perilous world of espionage. James Norval has built a successful career crafting the thrilling adventures of his fictional hero, Hunter Chase, a character admired by readers and movie-goers worldwide. But despite his fame and fortune, Norval has always harboured a secret dream of living the life he only writes about--a life as a field operative for CSIS, Canada's Security Intelligence Service. In fact, nearly thirty years earlier, he washed out of the CSIS recruitment program, and it's haunted him ever since. But that long-held dream becomes a reality when a series of unfortunate events lands Norval in a foreign prison. Rescued by CSIS, he is given an unexpected opportunity: to use his unique position as the favourite writer of Mali's newly installed president to assist in a delicate and dangerous mission. With the help of agent Lauren Cooper, Norval must infiltrate the Malian government and execute a daring plan to exfiltrate fifteen Canadian nationals before the corrupt powers that control the country uncover their true intentions. The Marionette is a comic thriller by a master of the craft. Full of Terry Fallis' signature wit and combined with an exhilarating high-stakes plot, this is a must-read for fans of espionage and intrigue.
Titus and Roni
Two parents who, in facing death, face life. Perhaps for the first time. Titus, as well as being a father, is a grandfather. He has been kidnapped by his son in Colombia; Roni is a Glaswegian mother whose son, in twenty-four hours, will be executed by lethal injection. They are two novellas which, whilst they could exist separately, also complement each other. They are stories of doom, but not of gloom; stories, certainly of tragedy, but ingrained with both comedy and optimism. Their two principal characters surrender in order to fight on and traverse despair to find hope. They are two unremarkable people who, in finally accepting death, triumph over life, and become thereby remarkable indeed. Certainly, you will cry with Titus and with Roni, but also you will laugh with them. You will despair with them, and clutch at the same straws. Written with Dark's customary elegance, Titus and Roni is as mellifluous in its telling as it is compulsive in its tale.
Charming!
IT'S THE STORY THEY DIDN'T WANT YOU TO HEAR! FINALLY PRINCE CHARMING TALKS! In his time, the man was a cross between James Bond and Nelson Mandela. And yet what do we know about him? That his name is Prince Charming and that he fits a mean glass slipper! That's it. For generations Prince Charming has been Dr Watson to the Holmes of Cinderella and maybe even Charles to Diana. He was an amalgam of Jack Kennedy and Tom Sawyer, Spartacus and Jim Hawkins, John Lennon and Mr D'Arcy. Far from being the anodyne and lifeless character of legend, the Prince was a wild and fascinating man, whose often paradoxical character was forged in a youth crammed with intrigue and adventure. And love? Well, yes, there was some love; even (shock, horror!) some other girlfriends before Cinderella. But the romance of Charming!' is one in the broader sense of the word: a romantic novel set in times considerably less romantic than they have been portrayed.
The Book of George
From the author of the critically acclaimed Laura & Emma comes a The Love Affairs of Nathaniel P. for our times: Kate Greathead's "mesmerizing" (Maria Semple) excavation of millennial masculinity, The Book of George. If you haven't had the misfortune of dating a George, you know someone who has. He's a young man brimming with potential but incapable of following through; sweet yet noncommittal to his long-suffering girlfriend; distant from but still reliant on his mother; charmingly funny one minute, sullenly brooding the next. Here, Kate Greathead paints one particular, unforgettable George in a series of droll and surprisingly poignant snapshots of his life over two decades. Despite his failings, it's hard not to root for George at least a little. Beneath his cynicism is a reservoir of fondness for his girlfriend, Jenny, and her valiant willingness to put up with him. Each demonstration of his flaws is paired with a self-eviscerating comment. No one is more disappointed in him than himself (except maybe Jenny and his mother). As hilarious as it is resonant and as singular as it is universal, The Book of George is a deft, unexpectedly moving portrait of one man--but also countless others.
More to Life
Retired school teacher Colette Corbyn goes kicking and screaming into assisted living, when she has planned to live out her days in the privacy of her own home. As she begrudgingly settles into Shady Meadow, she makes an unlikely friend, Margaret, who claims the Women's Movement demeaned women. A loud, obnoxious neighbor, Dottie, seems to be off her rocker, but she's actually addicted to opioids and has an alarming secret life. Best-selling novelist Susan Hartley, afflicted with Alzheimer's, doesn't recognize her latest book, and becomes violent when she mistakes Colette for her sister. Colette struggles to come to terms with her sometimes-contentious daughter Brooke and seeks a relationship with her grandson Carter, long lost down the rabbit hole of QAnon. Colette thinks she is done with romance until she meets Harry, who suffers from AMD and can only read music through a magnifying glass. As Colette and Harry share their love of piano playing, Colette discovers complications in his life which may prevent their relationship from enduring. With compassion and wit, Lynch demonstrates that old age has its perks, and, nearing the end of life, every day is worth living to its fullest.*****Legacy Book Press LLC is a traditional publisher of personal stories told via non-fiction, fiction, poetry, or a combination.
R J Lamp Post A Day In The Life
Not all heroes wear capes-some shine from eight feet above the pavement.Meet R.J. Lamp Post, the most unlikely storyteller you'll ever encounter. From his spot on a Michigan street corner, R.J. has seen it all-wild thunderstorms, mischievous kids, neighborhood drama, daring rescues, and even a few laugh-out-loud disasters. With humor, heart, and a streetlight's unique perspective, he shares the stories of everyday life that unfold under his steady glow.Whether he's scaring off burglars with a burst of blinking light, watching a boy's tongue get hilariously stuck to his icy pole, or quietly keeping vigil during secret midnight meetings, R.J. proves he's more than just a fixture. He's a guardian, a witness, and sometimes an unwilling participant in the chaos of community life.Virginia M. Lawrence's A Day in the Life is a charming, funny, and unexpectedly touching tale that will make you laugh, reflect, and never look at a streetlight the same way again. Perfect for readers who enjoy lighthearted fiction with a dash of wit and heart.
Will There Ever Be Another You
NAMED A MOST ANTICIPATED BOOK OF 2025 BY THE NEW YORK TIMES, THE WASHINGTON POST, TIME, USA TODAY, VULTURE, ROLLING STONE, W MAGAZINE, AND MORE "Lockwood has written a roving chronicle of the madness of illness and the frightening porousness of what it means to be yourself in the hilariously profound way that only she could." - Vulture "God, is she funny." - The New Yorker From the Booker Prize finalist and "formidably gifted writer" (The New York Times), a vertiginous novel about a woman's descent into illness and insanity. Amid a global pandemic, one young woman is trying to keep the pieces together - of her family, stunned by a devastating loss, and of her mind, left mangled and misfiring from a mystifying disease. She's afraid of her own floorboards, and "WHAT IS LOVE? BABY DON'T HURT ME" plays over and over in her ears. She hates her friends, or more accurately, she doesn't know who they are. Has the illness stolen her old mind and given her a new one? Does it mean she'll get to start over from scratch, a chance afforded to very few people? The very weave of herself seems to have loosened: time and memories pass straight through her body. "I'm sorry not to respond to your email," she writes, "but I live completely in the presentnow." Will There Ever Be Another You is the brain-shredding, phosphorescent story of one woman's dissolution and her attempt to create a new way of thinking, as well as a profound investigation into what keeps us alive in times of unprecedented disorientation and loss, from one of our most original writers. Praise for Will There Ever Be Another You "Patricia Lockwood... writes with the impish verve and provocative guilelessness of a peeing cupid." - The New Yorker "Completely singular... Patricia Lockwood's body of work is like this: a hymn--or ode, depending on the day--to the painful project of being human." - The New Republic "The author's fans will find her trademark humor, originality, and depth on full display. This is a knockout." - starred Publishers Weekly Praise for No One Is Talking About This "A book that reads like a prose poem, at once sublime, profane, intimate, philosophical, witty and, eventually, deeply moving." --The New York Times "Reading Patricia Lockwood raises questions. Questions such as, How can a person understand both herself and the world with such clarity? How does a person experience things so intensely and express them so buoyantly? Am I laughing or am I crying? Lockwood's first novel is as crystalline, witty, and brain-shredding as her poetry and criticism." --Vulture "Wow. I can't remember the last time I laughed so much reading a book. What an inventive and startling writer...I'm so glad I read this. I really think this book is remarkable." --David Sedaris "God, is she funny!" --The New Yorker
The Case of the Stolen Underwear
All the underwear have been stolen from The Dilly Dollar Store and a quirky small-town reporter slowly gets involved in trying to solve the disturbing crime. As she follows the case, stolen underwear start resurfacing in odd places, including on the head of a park statue and on a supermarket watermelon. Her co-workers at the newspaper blend into the crazy background of personality disorders, including someone who gets fired every day. As she slowly rules out suspects, she feels she is closing in on the perpetrator. The unexpected ending brings her into a face-to-face confrontation with the underwear villain. Will justice prevail?
Ms. Mia and Murder at the Desert Sunrise Resort
A Stolen Treasure, a Glamorous Resort, and a Whirlwind of Clever Sleuthing...Embark on a Southwestern adventure full of fun, secrets, and suspense with Ms. Mia, a modern-day Miss Marple with a humorous twist. The charming amateur sleuth never misses a chance to discover secrets and rearrange lives at Spinel Resorts, the boutique hotel chain founded by her late husband. When an ancient flute is unearthed at The Desert Sunrise Resort, Ms. Mia seizes the chance to host a dazzling exhibit, roping in charismatic archaeologist Kyle Lee to star in a documentary. But when the priceless artifact vanishes in the dead of night, the grand opening teeters on the brink of disaster-along with Ms. Mia's reputation.Armed with wit, champagne, and aid from her prankster nephew and the resort's brilliant concierge, Ms. Mia dives into the investigation. At her hotels, no thief-or murderer-escapes unchecked!Perfect for fans of Agatha Christie's Miss Marple, Donna Andrews' Meg Langslow, and Joanne Fluke's Hannah Swenson, this delightful whodunit overflows with charm, humor, and clever twists.Check in to a lighthearted, thrilling getaway where mystery meets glamour with Ms. Mia and Murder at the Desert Sunrise Resort!
Holy Cow
A rollicking, globe-trotting adventure with a twist: a four-legged heroine you won't soon forget. Elsie Bovary is a cow, and a pretty happy one at that--her long, lazy days are spent eating, napping, and chatting with her best friend, Mallory. One night, Elsie and Mallory sneak out of their pasture; but while Mallory is interested in flirting with the neighboring bulls, Elsie finds herself drawn to the farmhouse. Through the window, she sees the farmer's family gathered around a bright Box God--and what the Box God reveals about something called an "industrial meat farm" shakes Elsie's understanding of her world to its core. There's only one solution: escape to a better, safer world. And so a motley crew is formed: Elsie; Jerry--excuse me, Shalom--a cranky, Torah-reading pig who's recently converted to Judaism; and Tom, a suave (in his own mind, at least) turkey who can't fly, but who can work an iPhone with his beak. Toting stolen passports and slapdash human disguises, they head for the airport. Elsie is our wisecracking, pop-culture-reference-dropping, slyly witty narrator; Tom--who does eventually learn to fly (sort of)--dispenses psychiatric advice in a fake German accent; and Shalom, rejected by his adopted people in Jerusalem, ends up unexpectedly uniting Israelis and Palestinians. In Holy Cow, David Duchovny's charismatic creatures point the way toward a mutual understanding and acceptance that the world desperately needs.
Clone
Would you rather be Unlucky or Immoral?Murphy Lawler is not a bad person, but when he's around bad things tend to happen. He suffers in ignorance until an explanation arrives. Murphy's misfortune is hard wired into his genetic code. He's cursed at a molecular level.Things have gone from bad to worse. His wife, his friends, and society at large react, and not with a gentle, reasoned calm. Murphy loses everything. But Murphy's plight has a silver lining. The doctors start to experiment. Neither they nor the world is prepared for their success. A success they'd rather keep locked away.Word gets out about this unnatural selection. The clone is a problem, but he doesn't want to be solved. Light your torches and sharpen your pitchforks to hunt the monster in Clone, an absurd adventure full of humour and wit. Murphy and his unethical twin are on a collision course.Think twice, then...Buy Now
Happy Holidays?
My book is about holidays I have taken with immediate family, friends from school or my school career as a senior teacher all over the world, including most of the UK, nearly all Europe, Australia, South Africa, Canada and the USA. It has serious stories in it, but is mostly about things that perhaps didn't perhaps go quite as they should, and there were many little disasters. It is basically a poor man's Bill Bryson's travel around the Gordon holidays.
Happy Holidays?
My book is about holidays I have taken with immediate family, friends from school or my school career as a senior teacher all over the world, including most of the UK, nearly all Europe, Australia, South Africa, Canada and the USA. It has serious stories in it, but is mostly about things that perhaps didn't perhaps go quite as they should, and there were many little disasters. It is basically a poor man's Bill Bryson's travel around the Gordon holidays.
Ghost in Training
What happens when your life ends, but your work doesn't?Welcome to Ghostland, a realm where the recently deceased find themselves. Not in Heaven or Hell, but in a transitional service agency where unresolved lives still matter. A rookie ghost named Ron, fresh off a grueling week of training, is assigned his first mission that thrusts him into the lives of a widower and his young daughter. With compassion and understanding-traits he lacked in life-Ron seeks his redemption, realizing the stakes are higher than he ever imagined.Will Ron succeed in helping Nick and Claire? Can he confront his past and grow beyond it? And what about Gayle, his pushy mentor? Will she ever give him a break?Dive into the intriguing world of Nearly Departed, where ghosts discover that sometimes, the greatest peace in the afterlife comes from making a difference with those still living, and unfinished business takes on a new meaning.
Peter Pan
Peter Pan, the timeless classic by J. M. Barrie, invites readers into the magical world of Neverland, where adventure, wonder, and imagination reign supreme. This enchanting tale explores the joys and challenges of childhood, the inevitability of growing up, and the enduring power of belief in magic. The Story of Neverland When Peter Pan, the boy who refuses to grow up, flies into the lives of Wendy Darling and her brothers, they embark on an unforgettable journey to Neverland. Alongside the mischievous Tinker Bell, the daring Lost Boys, and their fierce nemesis Captain Hook, the Darling children experience thrilling adventures filled with pirates, mermaids, and the magic of flight. Key Themes: Childhood and Imagination: A celebration of the innocence and boundless creativity of youth. Adventure and Freedom: Exploring the joys of escapism and the yearning for freedom from adult responsibilities. Friendship and Loyalty: The bonds formed in times of challenge and wonder. Why Read Peter Pan? This beloved classic is more than just a children's story-it is a profound meditation on the fleeting nature of childhood and the enduring need for dreams and adventure. Whether you're revisiting it as an adult or discovering it for the first time, Peter Pan is a magical tale that continues to inspire and delight readers of all ages.
DimWitts
Charlie Witt is certain his brother is a superhero, but that Michael is too stupid to know it.Lancaster Dirk, the newly elected American president, is on a race to destroy his enemies and restore the glory of the republic. But to do it, he needs something extremely important. Something Canadian.A dirty old smelter in a dirty old B.C. mountain town - with an even dirtier old secret.Balanced between worlds, the past and future collide in a tale that spans the globe - and the very edges of reality itself.
DimWitts
Charlie Witt is certain his brother is a superhero, but that Michael is too stupid to know it.Lancaster Dirk, the newly elected American president, is on a race to destroy his enemies and restore the glory of the republic. But to do it, he needs something extremely important. Something Canadian.A dirty old smelter in a dirty old B.C. mountain town - with an even dirtier old secret.Balanced between worlds, the past and future collide in a tale that spans the globe - and the very edges of reality itself.
Modern Dance, Brass Balls, and....
In this humorous story set in the repressive 1950s, insecure Lars Jonson reveals two deep, closely guarded secrets: His lifelong dream is to become a professional modern dancer, and he believes himself to be homosexual. These characteristics are frowned upon and, indeed, despised in his Southside Chicago neighborhood. When in his high school's college placement office he chances upon a brochure advertising an exciting new program in Modern Dance-led by none other than the famous dancer Diego Ra, at the Wilbur M. Butz College in Alesburg, Illinois-he thinks, This will be my nirvana. Here he can realize his dream to become a modern dancer, surrounded by fellow dance enthusiasts and maybe with a sampling of homos around as well. Moreover, he will be in a safe place, far, far away from the haters in his Southside Chicago neighborhood. So, he packs his bag and heads for Butz College. Unfortunately, not all dreams come true, and Lars's nirvana is not exactly as was proclaimed in the brochure. In an achingly funny and painfully human voice, Lars shares his disillusionment and hopelessness. But in the depths of despair, Lars finds the courage to face, and defeat, his demons head-on and discovers his dreams may be well within reach.
The Kings of the Backyard
We are called to live out the hero's journey. For some of us, that calling isn't answered until well into middle age and beyond. The Kings of the Backyard follows the lives of three 30 somethings who never set a goal, never tried and never committed to anything, as they attempt to add meaning to their ordinary and mostly mundane lives. It is a classic story of those suffering arrested development, being forced to grow up by a world that does not reward such waste. What are they going to do now that their 20's are over? Get stable jobs? Find partners and settle down? NO WAY! That would be too easy for our heroes. Follow them as they navigate life's tragedies and push back against the very society that enabled their existence to begin with. Cheer them on as they go kicking and screaming into maturity and celebrate when they are finally crowned, The Kings of the Backyard.
Seashells, Gator Bones, and the Church of Everlasting Liability
"Makes me wonder if God's even up there at all. And if he is, why ain't he doing a better job of things down here. Unless maybe he's doing the best he can."In 1930s Toad Springs, Florida, a three-legged gator with Jesus's birthmark draws pilgrims while the town's residents navigate church scandals, family secrets, and failed businesses. Through authentic voices in genuine dialect, these interconnected tales reveal how ordinary people survived the Depression with humor, faith, and resilience. From teenage betrayal to beauty shop disasters, from prison-trained preachers to secret knitters, Susan Adger weaves an unforgettable portrait of Old Florida that will make you laugh, cry, and feel you've found a community of friends.
Lobster Salad, By P.b. St. John And E. Copping
Dive into the delightful world of "Lobster Salad," a collection of humorous short stories by P.B. St. John and E. Copping. This classic work showcases the authors' wit and satirical perspective on 19th-century society. These stories, filled with eccentric characters and comical situations, offer a lighthearted escape and a glimpse into a bygone era. Perfect for readers seeking a quick, amusing read, "Lobster Salad" promises laughter and entertainment. Rediscover the charm of these timeless tales, and savor the humor that has amused readers for generations.This work has been selected by scholars as being culturally important, and is part of the knowledge base of civilization as we know it. This work was reproduced from the original artifact, and remains as true to the original work as possible. Therefore, you will see the original copyright references, library stamps (as most of these works have been housed in our most important libraries around the world), and other notations in the work.This work is in the public domain in the United States of America, and possibly other nations. Within the United States, you may freely copy and distribute this work, as no entity (individual or corporate) has a copyright on the body of the work.As a reproduction of a historical artifact, this work may contain missing or blurred pages, poor pictures, errant marks, etc. Scholars believe, and we concur, that this work is important enough to be preserved, reproduced, and made generally available to the public. We appreciate your support of the preservation process, and thank you for being an important part of keeping this knowledge alive and relevant.
Walking in My Sister's Shadow
Melina has always lived in the shadow of her older sister Monica, who is considered beautiful and accomplished, seemingly having everything. As Monica prepares to marry into one of the wealthiest families in town, Melina is expected to smile and assume the role of the supportive sister. However, when Melina discovers a long-hidden secret about Monica's fianc矇's family- a secret that could jeopardize not only the wedding but their entire future- she faces an incredibly difficult decision: remain silent to protect her sister's happiness or reveal the truth and risk everything. Walking in my sister's shadow is a poignant and gripping tale of family, identity, and the profound cost of silence. It explores the fragile bonds between sisters, the courage it takes to speak out, and the strength required to step out from behind someone else's brilliance and finally claim your own. Because sometimes, stepping out of the shadows doesn't just change your path - it sets the whole stage alight.
