Another Joke Book
These are jokes I've either read or have been told. I've compiled them all into this book IF YOUR PALM ITCHES YOU ARE GOING TO GET SOMETHINGBUT IF YOU'RE CROTCH ITCHES YOU ALL READY HAVE IT FREE MARRIAGE TIPDON'T ASK YOUR WIFE WHEN WILL DINNER BE READY WHILE SHE IS MOWING THE LAWN BEST FRIENDS DON'T CARE IF YOUR HOUSE IS CLEANTHEY CARE IF YOU HAVE BEER DURING A PROSTATE EXAM HE ASKED WHERE HE SHOULD PUT HIS PANTSBUT OVER THERE NEXT TO MINE IS NOT THE ANSWER HE WANTED TO HEAR I've been married to my wife for 57 years. I want to thank God, my wife Karen, my daughter Autumn and my grandson Dakota.
Mike and Psmith (Warbler Classics Annotated Edition)
Mike Jackson, cricket prodigy and easygoing student, is sent away from his beloved Wrykyn school to Sedleigh, a far smaller school, after a poor performance report card. Mike's spirits are at an all-time low, until he meets Rupert Psmith, an eccentric, monocle-wearing fellow newcomer whose verbal dexterity and force of personality quickly distinguish him. The P in his surname is silent ("as in pshrimp," in his own words) and was added by himself, in order to distinguish him from other Smiths. Together, Mike and Psmith navigate the challenges of their new school with humor and cleverness. While Mike longs to get back to his cricketing days, Psmith, with his unique outlook on life, has other ideas-taking Sedleigh by storm, one uproarious misadventure at a time. In this classic Wodehouse tale, readers are treated to a delightful mix of schoolboy camaraderie, sharp humor, and the larger-than-life charm of Psmith, one of Wodehouse's best-loved characters. Mike and Psmith is a sparkling early work from one of the greatest humorists of the twentieth century, filled with the wit, warmth, and wonderfully absurd characters that Wodehouse is known for. This Warbler Classics edition includes an extensive biographical timeline.
Leave It to Psmith (Warbler Classics Annotated Edition)
Leave It to Psmith by P. G. Wodehouse is an uproarious romp through the world of Blandings Castle, where misunderstandings and madcap schemes abound. When the enterprising and unflappable Psmith offers his services to "take care of everything," chaos ensues in the most charming and humorous way possible. From jewel thefts to mistaken identities, Wodehouse's wit shines as Psmith navigates a web of hilarious predicaments, all while maintaining his cool, impeccable style. A quintessential comedy of errors, Leave It to Psmith is a masterful blend of clever dialogue and eccentric characters, making it an enduring favorite of Wodehouse aficionados and anyone who delights in classic British humor. This Warbler Classics edition includes an extensive biographical timeline.
Psmith in the City (Warbler Classics Annotated Edition)
Psmith in the City showcases P. G. Wodehouse at his finest. In this sharp, witty novel we follow the irrepressible Psmith-an unconventional and effortlessly charming figure-and his steadfast friend Mike Jackson as they navigate the rigid confines of the New Asiatic Bank. Bound by the expectations of a corporate world that prizes order over creativity, Psmith refuses to conform. His irreverence for mundane office life and flair for bending the rules transform the humdrum routines of banking into a series of tellingly absurd encounters. For both seasoned Wodehouse fans and newcomers alike, Psmith in the City offers a clever satire of office life and a delightful foray into the antics of one of literature's most eccentric and lovable heroes. This Warbler Classics edition includes an extensive biographical timeline.
Psmith, Journalist (Warbler Classics Annotated Edition)
Psmith, Journalist begins with Psmith accompanying his Cambridge friend Mike to New York on a cricketing tour. By virtue of his boundless charm and flair, Psmith soon takes the reins of a small newspaper, which inadvertently lands him in the thick of a scandal involving corrupt slum landlords, prizefighting, and gangsters. The unflappable Psmith navigates a series of improbable twists and comic misunderstandings with characteristic wit and nonchalant elegance. Wodehouse effortlessly balances humor with social commentary in this light-hearted tale featuring one of Wodehouse's most enduring and endearing characters at his best. This Warbler Classics edition includes an extensive biographical timeline.
Party Girl
SECOND EDITION/THE PG VERSION FROM THE New York Times bestselling author comes the relaunch of the book that started the "Quit Lit" movement. Nearly two decades after HarperCollins released the original, Anna David has gone back and done what musicians have done for years: created a "clean version." This newly updated PG-rated second edition of the book is now back to entertain audiences with a tamer version of the story that shows the surprising hilarity of a sober life. Celebrity journalist Amelia Stone is the quintessential Hollywood party girl: she stays out late, rubs shoulders (and occasionally more) with celebrities and ingests copious amounts of cocaine. But after losing her job, her friends and much of her mind, Amelia makes the drastic decision to end her drug abuse. Once sober, she's hired by a big-name magazine to write a column detailing her wild adventures and she starts seeing the man who could be her Mr. Right. There's just one problem. Overnight, Amelia has become the new face of Hollywood nightlife, and her editors-who don't know she's come clean-want her to play the part. As the lure of her former fast-and-furious lifestyle begins to pull at her, she must decide whether to save herself or salvage her reputation as the ultimate party girl.
February Fever
All aboard. It's murder on the Valentine Train in a heart-racing mystery from Amazon Charts bestselling and Edgar Award-nominated author Jess Lourey.Mira James is heading to Oregon by rail with two of her best friends to attend a PI conference. Even better, she'll see Johnny, the love of her life, who's in Portland for an internship. It'll be scenic, swift, and safe. Until it isn't.When a winter storm brings the train to a dead stop in the Rockies, Mira discovers that a woman in the next cabin has been murdered, and her husband and child have vanished. Rumors of an escaped convict do nothing to ease the passengers' frazzled nerves. To Mira, every one of them is a suspect.Trapped in a snowbound train with only two people she can trust, Mira has to solve a baffling disappearance and track down a killer--if she isn't derailed herself. Permanently.Revised edition: This edition of February Fever includes editorial revisions.
Genteel Anarchists
All his former colleagues at the Met had warned former Detective Inspector Alex Lucas against retiring to a place where he had spent childhood holidays, but now, even as he stood in the pouring rain looking out at the grey North Sea he knew they had been wrong. There he was, newly-retired and recently divorced, in a small Yorkshire harbour village where he had purchased a tiny cottage and settled to enjoy life in a supportive community which had its own approach to local fiscal policy where general practice is not to pester the Inland Revenue too much. As far as possible, jobs are done for friends and small contracts are settled in 'beer vouchers' with little paperwork. Alex is determined to get to know the locals but he is reluctant to disclose the fact that he is a former police officer in the fraud squad in case this alienates him from the community and their less than official interpretation of tax laws. He eventually realises that he cannot expect to be welcomed in to the village if he insists upon having such a secret and he gradually lets his guard down. All is pretty much perfect in his little Shangri-La, even when his former mother-in-law moves in to the village with her attempts to promote some form of reconciliation between him and his former wife. The main threat to his new life occurs when the village's only pub is threatened with closure, but the villagers will not go down without a fight.
Party Girl
SECOND EDITION/THE PG VERSION FROM THE New York Times bestselling author comes the relaunch of the book that started the "Quit Lit" movement. Nearly two decades after HarperCollins released the original, Anna David has gone back and done what musicians have done for years: created a "clean version." This newly updated PG-rated second edition of the book is now back to entertain audiences with a tamer version of the story that shows the surprising hilarity of a sober life. Celebrity journalist Amelia Stone is the quintessential Hollywood party girl: she stays out late, rubs shoulders (and occasionally more) with celebrities and ingests copious amounts of cocaine. But after losing her job, her friends and much of her mind, Amelia makes the drastic decision to end her drug abuse. Once sober, she's hired by a big-name magazine to write a column detailing her wild adventures and she starts seeing the man who could be her Mr. Right. There's just one problem. Overnight, Amelia has become the new face of Hollywood nightlife, and her editors-who don't know she's come clean-want her to play the part. As the lure of her former fast-and-furious lifestyle begins to pull at her, she must decide whether to save herself or salvage her reputation as the ultimate party girl.
The Little Warrior
In The Little Warrior, P. G. Wodehouse crafts a delightful and heartwarming tale of resilience, romance, and reinvention. Jill Mariner is a young woman whose life is turned upside down when she suddenly loses her wealth and social standing. Refusing to give up, Jill decides to reinvent herself, embarking on an adventure that takes her from the high society of London to the bustling streets of New York. Along the way, she encounters a cast of unforgettable characters and learns important lessons about love, independence, and self-worth. With its sharp wit, engaging characters, and uplifting message, The Little Warrior is a classic romantic comedy that showcases Wodehouse's unparalleled ability to blend humor with heart. Jill's journey of self-discovery will resonate with readers who appreciate stories of personal growth and resilience.
Is That My Penis?
Come on a voyage exploring the wonderful world of willies, from the biggest to the smallest, the longest and the curliest, the first ever unofficial yet definitive animal Penis Book of Records... Is that my Penis? is a humourous yet still very educational, tongue in cheek look at the diverse and curious members of the animal kingdom.
Something's Not Right
Cornelius Left University with a degree, but has done nothing with his first class education. He lives with his parents, his mother dotes on him and waits on him hand and foot, while his father sees him as a lazy good for nothing slob, who hasn't done a day's work in years. He spends all day either on, or in his bed, supposedly working on the the problems of the world, while his father is out at work. Corny meets an old school friend on one of his rare days out which sets off a disastrous chain of events....
Thirteen Touched Tales
These are stories taken from literature that were written and published 100 or more years ago. They are stories that have been "touched," i.e., adapted, to make them more suitable to be told orally rather than read. The collection includes 13 of the authors favorite stories ready to be told. Within these stories are ghosts, humor, feeling, and fun. The original authors will be familiar to many readers. Some are targeted to adult audiences, others to children. Readers have permission to tell the adapted stories wherever and however they wish. Permissions extend to recording the stories. However, please don't copy the stories onto the internet, social media, and such.
Revenge of the Deadly Dozen
When justice is blind, can The Twelve see it through? Monica is barely a month into her role as leader of The Twelve-a secret group of retired experts tasked with eliminating London's most dangerous criminals-when a new case threatens to tear the team apart. Ex-plumber David Latham brings them a personal mission: assassinate Paul Storey, the only suspect who walked free after the racist murder of his best friend's son, Justin Morris in 2010.But as Monica and her team dig deeper, they uncover a web of corruption that reaches back decades. Old photos, hidden bribes, and buried secrets reveal the true killers and a sinister legacy of violence. And when police commissioner Suzanne Green makes a shocking confession, the team plot their own form of justice... As alliances are tested and enemies emerge from the shadows, Monica must lead The Twelve on their most dangerous mission yet. But will justice cost them everything?
Unredacted Expletives
Short stories arrive with us in all shapes and sizes. A bereaved family riven by internal friction. A beleaguered policeman with a rejuvenated wife. A burnt-out doctor, counting the minutes. Cameos from life in a small Welsh town. Diversions to other crises around the world. In his first foray into fiction, Christopher C James's incendiary and acerbically witty collection of short stories is a perfectly observed study of the malaise of modern day life.
Some Hero
Romance, Comedy and SuperpowersIt should be a snap, right? When Jason unexpectedly acquires superpowers, he figures he has it made. He'll become a superhero, sweep Penny off her feet and earn a mint in endorsements. All while inspiring a great love of literature in his students and leading his pub trivia team to victory.But it turns out that being a hero is harder than he thinks. Even when he's "more powerful than a locomotive," it's hard to find locomotives that need stopping. And his powers offer him surprisingly little help in preparing his classes, impressing women or paying off his credit card bills.During his first year teaching high school English, Jason makes little progress in becoming a superhero. On the other hand, he learns some important lessons about love, teaching and the limits of using comics as a guide to life.
The Perfectly Imperfect Little Girl
Embrace your wild, precious, perfectly imperfect life!The Perfectly Imperfect Little Girl is a subversive adult storybook that flips the script on traditional tales. Through evidence-based insights like "pretending to be perfect is never worth the cost" and "pleasing others is not why we are truly loved", this book captures the real, relatable experiences of women choosing authenticity over approval. Written to make you laugh, cry, and say "f*ck yes!" It celebrates the messy truth of being human.Meet a little girl with a curl right in the middle of her forehead. Some days, she's up and dressed without a fuss; other days, she's frustrated, messy, and rebellious. Either way, she's learning that she's just fine as she is. Each page is a bold reminder that trying to be perfect isn't the answer-it's about being your unique self as you ask and answer the question that matters: "On whose terms and for whose benefit am I living my wild and precious life?"In The Perfectly Imperfect Little Girl, you'll discover: Raw, honest reflections on embracing both your shining and messy moments-and why neither your looks, your emotions, nor your mistakes define your worthA bold perspective on saying "no," owning your choices, and living unapologetically in your own skinLife-changing insights about shedding "good girl" expectations to build a life that's true to your wild, precious spiritThis isn't just another story-it's an invitation to find your voice, claim your worth, and celebrate what makes you uniquely you.Let's get started-shake off those 'good girl' beliefs, savor each page, and remember: we're just f*cking fine!
2nd Last Chance
'Darren has reached deeply into the very bottom of toilet humour.''iiieeeooo.'Humankind has one more chance, a second-last chance, to survive. We are in a lot of trouble if these zany characters are our last hope.Prison Planet accommodates the American crew, safely landing with all dubious passengers intact. An evil warden assumes the role of dictator for the planet's lifers. Crew 7 must escape the clutches of the warden and his hench . . . men/women/other. But who are the real criminals?The House of FILTH. Some still dealing with their own afflictions, the ex-psychiatric patients stumble upon an oasis on a new planet. The 'most powerful organisation in the universe' does not take kindly to strangers.In another world, on the isolated island of Retro-Tech, who or what is the unknown entity that has seized control? Climb aboard the realm-hopping transport with Arros Sole to get to the bottom of it.
I Inherited a Mixed Animal from Uncle Living in Woods
I Inherited a Mixed Animal from Uncle Living in Woods is a tale of hillbilly magical realism about the friendship that develops between a cranky fix-it man and the strange animal which fate and a mad scientist uncle drop in his lap. Young misanthrope Lemuel Washington is a self-semi-educated handyman/inventor in the village of Hmm, where he resides in mutual deterrence with his fortune-telling mayoral candidate sister Shane. His hermit uncle perishes in the Unconscious Forest under violently mystical circumstances and bequeaths Lemuel the animal in question. Lem is forced to caretake the inexplicable beast, root out its elusive origins, and safeguard it from its nemeses: the looming Strangitor, Mabel the mountain woman, and Sister Shane. Eventually Lemuel must decide if he will sell the animal, now the one and only thing he loves, in order to save the whole stinking world.
2nd Last Chance
'Darren has reached deeply into the very bottom of toilet humour.''iiieeeooo.'Humankind has one more chance, a second-last chance, to survive. We are in a lot of trouble if these zany characters are our last hope.Prison Planet accommodates the American crew, safely landing with all dubious passengers intact. An evil warden assumes the role of dictator for the planet's lifers. Crew 7 must escape the clutches of the warden and his hench . . . men/women/other. But who are the real criminals?The House of FILTH. Some still dealing with their own afflictions, the ex-psychiatric patients stumble upon an oasis on a new planet. The 'most powerful organisation in the universe' does not take kindly to strangers.In another world, on the isolated island of Retro-Tech, who or what is the unknown entity that has seized control? Climb aboard the realm-hopping transport with Arros Sole to get to the bottom of it.
Captcha This!
In 2015, J. W. Wood jacked in his day job and disappeared to his homestead two acres on an island off the coast of British Columbia - armed only with an axe, some tools and the determination to free himself. Captcha This!, the result of eight years invested in the middle of nowhere, spares no one: pompous investment bankers, vacuous fame-hunters, feudal tech overlords, invasive grammar-nazi software, government by bogus statistic and further denizens of today's digital abyss all receive a not-so-gentle skewering.In 2015, J.W. Wood jacked in his day job and disappeared. He went off to homestead two acres of island in rural British Columbia, Canada - armed only with an axe, some tools and the determination to free himself. Captcha This! focuses on our modern world as sieved through seven years of cutting firewood, growing veg, clearing bush and watching the world go by. These satires puncture the pomposity of investment bankers, the vacuity of fame and social media, feudal tech overlords, grammar-nazi software, government by bogus statistic and other denizens of today's digital abyss."J.W. Wood's stories evince a gift for the quotidian, employing brilliant conceits and mischevious turns of phrase which enrich the writing at every point. Capturing the frustration of curtailed lives and the grim horrors of the corporate world, Wood presents a meta-fictional universe in which the rich realise their folly and we control computers, not the other way round."-Julian Stannard, award-winning poet and author of The University of Bliss (Sagging Meniscus Press, USA, 2024)"Captcha This! pulls off a coup in eviscerating the system while not being vicious or cruel to any person or group." -Paul Halas, author of The Rights of Man And Fish
January Thaw
The discovery of a frozen stiff reveals old buried secrets in a witty and invigorating mystery from Amazon Charts bestselling and Edgar Award-nominated author Jess Lourey.It may be six below zero, but an ice-skating jaunt gets even more chilling for private investigator in training Mira James. She's just locked eyes with a frozen corpse floating under a sheet of ice.The man, a curious transient who's been researching local history, also rescued Mira and her best friend from a mugging the night before. His death is no accident, but it is a mystery. To solve it, Mira follows a trail leading to the alleged haunting of a historic museum and a centuries-old tragedy that has yet to claim its final victim.With a killer on the loose amid a freakish winter thaw, Mira is on thin ice. If she doesn't watch her back, she could be the next one to go under.Revised edition: This edition of January Thaw includes editorial revisions.
A Foreign Plot
Englishman Charlie Funble is determined to build his dream house in Bulgaria. Willhe succeed, despite not knowing the language and exact location of his plot? Or, willhis dream fall apart in a series of farces?Simultaneously, he is supervising a loft conversion in London for an alcoholic anddysfunctional couple. A practical joke by one of his workmen convinces Sue Belcherand Dick Fruit their house is haunted. Their mischievous cleaner - Nelly - is keen tooffer and arrange an exorcism. But will it be the real thing?Meanwhile, the builder in Bulgaria goes AWOL and Charlie doesn't know how to gethim back! Will Charlie ever see his dream house built, and the ghostly loft conversioncompleted?
I Inherited a Mixed Animal from Uncle Living in Woods
I Inherited a Mixed Animal from Uncle Living in Woods is a tale of hillbilly magical realism about the friendship that develops between a cranky fix-it man and the strange animal which fate and a mad scientist uncle drop in his lap. Young misanthrope Lemuel Washington is a self-semi-educated handyman/inventor in the village of Hmm, where he resides in mutual deterrence with his fortune-telling mayoral candidate sister Shane. His hermit uncle perishes in the Unconscious Forest under violently mystical circumstances and bequeaths Lemuel the animal in question. Lem is forced to caretake the inexplicable beast, root out its elusive origins, and safeguard it from its nemeses: the looming Strangitor, Mabel the mountain woman, and Sister Shane. Eventually Lemuel must decide if he will sell the animal, now the one and only thing he loves, in order to save the whole stinking world.
I'm Back!
Arthur. Norman. Is. Alive!After 25 years in absentia, Arthur Norman returns.Have you met Arthur?He's a friend, son, father, serial killer . . .
To the Hazel Wood
A handsome brooding newcomer wanders into the local pub in tiny Lough Croi and into the life of a feisty red-head from his past. But he's not the hero of the story, she is. Starry-eyed, wicked-tongued Maedbh Kelly sees the world with a bartender's insight as she struggles to lift from beige to brilliant, with the help of her family, her hilarious friends, her rowdy football team and an elderly soulmate. But when the irresistible Conal McNulty arrives, bringing secrets, lies and a history of violence, her world is thrown arse over elbow, reminding her that if trouble looks hard enough, it always finds you. The craic is mighty in this edge-of-your-seat novel set in a modern Ireland of ancient stone walls and green fields, where the past lives alongside the present. From a long-ago crime to a dangerous family showdown to an old cottage in a hazel wood, nothing can distract Maedbh from her sense of destiny, Never on to back down from a good fight - with strong words and a steady heart - she soon finds out what separates heartbreak from happily ever after. Full of comical twists and thrilling turns, To the Hazel Wood is a story about family and fate... true love and redemption... and the quintessential Irish creed of laughing in the face of calamity.
Trudi's Triumph
"The craziest, weirdest, funniest, spy spoof I've ever encountered."What's wrong with us Brits? Nothing that Trudi can't put right. A pre-teen feisty female like her can fix anything. Especially when she's teamed up with a crazy cat, a cantankerous parrot and an MI6 agent with a history of mental health issues.Unfortunately, reshaping the nation's destiny is a tad trickier than it looks. Plus, events and people have an annoying knack of going their own way, instead of doing what they're told.A drawback of being twelve is that there are one or two things in life left to learn after all. Not that she's the only one. Grownups in this story have a fair few shocks in store too. But are they delights or disasters? It's possible that the end of this story is really just a beginning ...
The AfterLife of Undead Ned
Has it ever felt like your partner is just dead weight when it comes to sharing domestic duties? This is the book for you. "The AfterLife of Undead Ned: A Home Care Survival Guide" is a light-hearted allegory that offers a heartwarming twist on the classic household manual, blending delicious home-cooked recipes with dead easy cleaning and maintenance tips. Follow the story of a wife who, tired of her deadbeat husband's refusal to help around the house, gets a shocking surprise when he catches a zombie virus and becomes a literal brain-dead husk. But rather than let him rot, she seizes the opportunity to turn his undead body into a chore-tackling machine. As she gets her zombie spouse sweeping, scrubbing, and stirring, readers will learn how to keep any household from turning into a graveyard of dirt clods, dust-bunnies, dastardly spills, and doggone insect droppings. With mouthwatering and easy-to-follow recipes that even a zombie could prepare, and tips for maximizing the lifespan of everything from dryers to drapes and carpets to ceiling fans, each chapter is packed with humor, practical advice, and a series of bite-sized tasks to make keeping house a no-brainer. As the wife's clever approach begins to bring her zombie back to life, it becomes clear that maybe the secret to a happy home isn't about biting off more than you can chew, but about taking little, regular bites-of brains and burdens! Includes daily, weekly, and seasonal checklists of all cleaning and maintenance tasks needed to keep the house gleaming and extend the lifespan of furnishings, appliances, and undead husbands. Perfect as a wedding shower or housewarming gift, or for anyone who could use some help making housework feel less like the end of the world, "The AfterLife of Undead Ned" is the must-have survival guide for those trying to keep their home (and partner) from falling apart.
Mr Isbister's Marvellous Ride
"It was the bane and the beauty of being a traveller, he supposed. To meet, to love, and to leave."It's 1922, and Mr Roderick Throckmorton Isbister is an earnest, unassuming fellow whose life in a house of privilege in the quiet English countryside is mundane and unfulfilling. Since coming to Sowerby Grange some twenty-five years earlier as a reluctant groom to his wife Alice's equally reluctant bride, things had fallen rather short of his expectations, although not for a lack of interests. And his are an eclectic mix: art, fungi, amphibians.His wife has never understood his fascination with art or the woodland world, so to avoid her disapproval, Mr Isbister indulges his pursuits surreptitiously. The chance to transform his unhappy existence comes about after he makes an inebriated purchase of a 1917 "Trusty" Triumph motorcycle from a dubious character with multiple guises.The bike and the discovery of his wife's tryst with an old flame are the catalyst for Mr's decision to go adventuring. He's accompanied, on a whim, by his resourceful and enigmatic housemaid, Eliza, riding along in the sidecar, but when he finds an anonymous note tucked into his haversack warning him of her suspect past, our protagonist finds himself questioning his choices, struggling with his failings, and navigating the rocky road of friendship. Endearing, big-hearted, humourous, Mr Isbister's Marvellous Ride is a delightful voyage of self-discover, and storytelling at its best.
Portergeist
The parents are lost in the past that formed them; the children raise themselves as a result from neglect and unintended, emotional abuse. Meanwhile, the Portergeist ('dead, my arse'), communicating to them all through modern media, tries to control and direct each of them to get his brother to play with him again in the fiery wake. Fantasies combine with a loose understanding of what is really happening, questioning everyone's identity, perspective, resilience and voice. Portergeist is a social history covering a fifty-year timespan explored through the distorted internal logic of mental illness, life as seen through the eyes of children and a very quirky humour. For those who have not experienced dysfunction on the level of this family, it is an unsettling read, but there is a happy ending, even for the last of the family's flea-bitten cats. 'I loved this book, craziness and all. Families can make or break us and the author has decided for the former, with a huge injection of fantasy and humour. The different family voices are so well delineated I feel I would know them instantly if I met them - a wild ride through a lifetime!' - Maryanne Coleman (Goblin Market, Pandemonium) 'I couldn't put it down. For me, the references to the TV and radio shows of my childhood really pulled me in and I felt that I was really there, watching with the Portergeist as the family implodes. It works as a memoir and a fantasy and anyone struggling with a difficult family background should read this - some humour and a bit of a sideways look will always make things bearable in the end.'- M.J. Trow
Alya Sometimes Hides Her Feelings in Russian, Vol. 6
Everyone at Seirei Academy witnessed Alya's victory at the trivia showdown on the festival's opening day, and since then they've all been enjoying the event. The final day of the festival approaches, but when Alya and her band get ready to take the stage, a major incident occurs! Someone is scheming to ruin the festival, but Masamichi is determined to deal with it so that Alya can have her time to shine. After all, the show must go on!
Molly Munday's Cupcakes
An inheritance from her late mother's estate, gives Molly the opportunity to turn her passion and experience with baking into a small business. The timing of this coinciding with life's changes that come to a woman of Molly's age. Molly's character is a confident, popular, fun-loving individual who sometimes can be a little naughty. Along with her best friend and new business partner, Iris, the short stories relate the highs and lows during the first year of Molly Munday's new venture.
Mischief & Mayhem
An hilarious feel good novel about the neighboursWithin a few hours of moving into their new home, Archie Halibut, his mother and his stepfather, George, are ambushed by a series of events that make them wonder what on earth kind of neighbourhood they have moved into.Archie unfairly gets accused of raiding next door's dustbin, their cat gets chased by next door's pet ferret, which results in the destruction of most of their coffee cups and George gets badly bitten on the finger, when he tries to intervene.When they get to meet the kids next door, they begin to realise that there could be much more chaos to come. And they are absolutely right.
Thank You For The Days
Every day counts when you're chasing love, life, and a little bit of madness...Luke Milvaine is a drifting 30-something stuck in a dead-end job with an even deader love life. Then the sudden death of a school friend leaves him with a cockapoo puppy and a bizarre challenge: to celebrate a different fake holiday every day for a year. Shower With a Friend Day, Talk Like Shakespeare Day, National Burger Day... What starts as a ridiculous stunt becomes a life-changing journey filled with strange encounters, surprising friendships, and the unexpected realisation that love might be right under his nose. With humour, heart, and a dash of absurdity, Luke discovers that sometimes, the biggest adventure is learning to appreciate the little things and rethink what - and who - truly matters.Thank You for the Days is a humorous, heartfelt journey about finding meaning in the mundane and learning to live with purpose.
Someone Better Than You
For years, Brady Ritz writes satire about his family and friends under a fake name, but when vanity leads him to publish a collection of his essays under his own name, his wife Natalie leaves him alone in their Naples, Florida golf community. It doesn't matter that what he wrote is often right, or that he concealed people's identities. Once they learn Brady wrote a book, people start reading, and finding themselves.
Confessions of an Ageing Tennis Player
Remember when you were young and you emulated your sporting heroes in the streets or school playground? Remember the days when you were going to win the 100m sprint/ The World Cup? Wimbledon? 'Confessions of an Ageing Tennis Player is a short story about our dreams and our disappointments, our failures and our triumphs. It's about a man of a certain age who lived those fantasies when he was young and never quite moved on as he grew up. It's a story of how he becomes sporting zero to hero and back again set against the backdrop of Wimbledon in 2013 when Andy Murray was the first British player to win there in decades. Unsurprisingly, Andy makes surprise appearances throughout the book.The must-go-to guide book for all of us who have never quite managed to succeed on the tennis court: or indeed anywhere else in life.
Adventures in Poetry
"Hal Crook has created a new poetic form: the poetorial!" Margie Keil Flanders, FormerManaging Editor, Crosswinds Poetry Journal "Hal Crook is the king of irony, and he writesa mean poetorial!" Paul Hostovsky, author of Pitching for the Apostates "Crook transforms poetry into a sweet but changedinstrument for argument, education, and whimsy."Rod Kessler, Professor Emeritus, Salem State HAL CROOK, Professor Emeritus, Berklee Collegeof Music is an internationally known jazz musician.He has published four books on jazz improvisation, one novel, one collection of short stories, and one volume of poetry. From the FOREWORD... As ludicrous as this may sound, this book isa competition between Jazz-an art form I havepracticed and played professionally for most of mylife, which many people consider to be an acquiredtaste itself-and numerous other subjects that mayhave the feel or vibe of an acquired taste to them. Though for some of these subjects, you will have touse your imagination a little to grasp the connectionto an acquired taste. Or a lot. Or not at all, if you'rea certain kind of person. Like, a little bit off is good.Or a lot. So relax, because who isn't? Each piece is written in the style of a narrativeeditorial, but expressed in the form of a poem, e.g., using stanzas and line breaks-like this one-and other elements of poetry as well, such as clich矇s-those old familiar sayings used to help the readerunderstand what the writer is talking about. Know what I'm saying? More Comments..."Hal Crook is the king of irony, has a beautiful smile, writes a mean poetorial, and can spell loquacious and empty a trombone spit valve simultaneously." Paul Hostovsky, author of Pitching for the Apostates"Should anyone be surprised that a jazzman-turned-author like Hal Crook-a musician famous for improvising-should start riffing on the very form of poetry, as he does in ADVENTURES IN POETRY: Poetorials on JAZZ and Other Acquired Tastes, transforming that art into a sweet but changed instrument for argument, meditation, edu- cation, and whimsy? I learned a lot from these pages." Rod Kessler, Professor Emeritus, Salem State University, author of Self-Portrait with Tree"Hal Crook has created a new poetic form: the poetorial! Smart, wild commentaries on the world, as only he sees it. A great read, with snorting laughs throughout. I'll happily read anything Hal writes." Margie Keil Flanders, Former Managing Editor, Crosswinds Poetry Journal, author of The Persuasive Beauty of Imperfection"Superb." Gregg Mazel, Technology Integration Specialist"Hal's writing is mind blowing!" Jesús Santandreu, Saxophonist/Educator"Thank you for putting 'life' into words so perfectly!" JoAnn Marzocchi Phillips, Vocalist/Educator"Stone-cold genius." Scot Jackson, Drummer/Educator"Words of wisdom!" Brian O'Connell, Bassist"One of the best, [Hal] writes from experience...says what we in jazz experience." Al MacDonald, Saxophonist"And there's the low down!" Bob Albanese, Pianist"Brilliant." Bob McChesney, Trombonist/Educator"This is fantastic poetry!" Kevin Sullivan, Saxophonist/Educator"Took me out of this world." Ola Piano, Pianist"Great work on so many levels. [Hal] creates in people the desire to think." JH Cooper, Saxophonist/Educator"Truth." Dave Zinno, Bassist/Educator"A thinking man's jazzbo." Eric S. Pettine, Trombonist/Educator"Loved this! A heart opens up and bleeds musical expression." Dave Dubinsky, Trumpeter/Educator"[Hal] never disappoints." Mark Miller, Trombonist "Read Hal Crook closely. We have giants among us." Andrew Dow, Bassist/Educator
The Last Conversation
Breakups are messy. They are raw, emotional, and often leave us questioning not just our relationships but our very sense of self. For Ansh, what started as heartbreak turned into a deep journey of self-discovery. His story is not just about the pain of letting go, but about the lessons learned through the process-lessons that many of us struggle with during the hardest moments of our lives.This is not just a guide to surviving a breakup; it's a reflection on how we, as individuals, can grow stronger from the very things that break us. Through Ansh's eyes, you'll see the common mistakes we make-clinging to hope, blaming others, or even losing ourselves in self-doubt. But more importantly, you'll see how it's possible to come out on the other side, not just intact but more resilient, more self-aware, and more confident.Ansh's journey speaks to anyone who has ever found themselves stuck in the aftermath of a relationship's end. It's for those who have depended too much on someone else to fix their lives, for those who have drowned their sorrows in temporary distractions, and for those who have forgotten to take care of themselves. This story is a reminder that breakups are not the end. They are a beginning-a time to reclaim who you are, rediscover your strength, and finally, to love yourself in ways you never did before. Ansh learned that survival after heartbreak is not just about moving on from someone else-it's about moving closer to the person you are meant to become.
December Dread
Going home for the holidays can be murder in a bracing mystery by Amazon Charts bestselling and Edgar Award-nominated author Jess Lourey.After more than a decade away, Mira James isn't keen on returning to her Minnesota hometown for the holidays. Her childhood memories aren't particularly jolly. Even less festive is the news of a serial killer on the loose.With only ten shopping days till Christmas, the Candy Cane Killer has been very busy slashing through the snow. Eager to earn her official PI stripes, Mira is anxious to track him down. But when the latest victim is a woman from her high school graduating class, the investigation hits a little too close to home.Even worse? Mira has good reason to fear that she's next. To stop a killer in his tracks, she may have to start digging into the ghosts of her own Christmas past.Revised edition: This edition of December Dread includes editorial revisions.
Always Be Santa
During the Christmas season there are Santa Clauses everywhere. The common explanation to kids who ask why they see so many guys in the red suits, is that they are all Santa's Helpers and they help out the real Santa every year at Christmas time. But could one of those helpers be the real Santa? That's the rumor you know. Santa Claus loves to go on special visits or be available for Santa photos so he can personally meet as many people as possible - all year long! "Always Be Santa: True Stories From The Guy In The Big Red Suit Vol. 1" provides a glimpse into the unique world of Santa Claus and his real encounters with real children and their families that happen year round in some very familiar places. In these pages you'll discover a collection of fun and heartwarming stories and beautiful illustrations, to be enjoyed as a family in a "Story A Day Until Christmas/Advent Style" experience. Families will find that these stories will enhance their Christmas celebration, while uplifting them and encouraging them to "Always Be Santa". Not just at Christmas time - but also all year long.
Always Be Santa
During the Christmas season there are Santa Clauses everywhere. The common explanation to kids who ask why they see so many guys in the red suits, is that they are all Santa's Helpers and they help out the real Santa every year at Christmas time. But could one of those helpers be the real Santa? That's the rumor you know. Santa Claus loves to go on special visits or be available for Santa photos so he can personally meet as many people as possible - all year long! "Always Be Santa: True Stories From The Guy In The Big Red Suit Vol. 1" provides a glimpse into the unique world of Santa Claus and his real encounters with real children and their families that happen year round in some very familiar places. In these pages you'll discover a collection of fun and heartwarming stories and beautiful illustrations, to be enjoyed as a family in a "Story A Day Until Christmas/Advent Style" experience. Families will find that these stories will enhance their Christmas celebration, while uplifting them and encouraging them to "Always Be Santa". Not just at Christmas time - but also all year long.
Caught Out There
Platonic comedy (platon-com): Because sometimes a man and a woman are actually just good friends who will never, ever have sex. Black: With a capital B and specific cultural intentions.Plot: With the world in disarray and human-form aliens appearing and disappearing all the time, the Earthlings have not ceased their quests for love and companionship. Heartly and Malik are lovelorn humans who meet by chance at a bar and forge a friendship that turns out to be the platonic rebound they both need. A mutual dare leads them to a Zodiac-based matchmaking service, and they soon realize that extraterrestrials are also on the market. As news of these Black-presenting aliens who call themselves "Notofearths" (as in, not of Earth) dominate media, the new besties wonder... Will they discover down-to-earth love or take the chance to see what's out there?
The Accidental Rewrite
From the Sunday Times and internationally acclaimed author Milly Johnson comes her charming US debut--a witty, heartwarming tale that combines the humor and charm of 1980s rom-com Overboard with classic British flavor. Dive into this remarkable women's fiction novel and join heroine Polly on her hilarious, touching journey to rewrite her own story.What if it was possible to start over again? To leave everything behind, forget all that went before, and live the life you'd always dreamed of?Polly Potter is losing the plot of her life. At work, her jerk of a boss is making her days unbearable. At home, she's trapped in an unappreciated relationship with a man-child of a partner. She's left completely drained by always putting others first. Amid this chaos, Polly finds solace in one place: the pages of her novel, where she shapes the world of the fearless and triumphant Sabrina Anderson, a character who embodies everything Polly wishes she could be. And thus a plan is born: Polly Potter is going to stop writing the life she wants and start living it.Just as she makes her move--quitting her job, leaving her partner, and embarking on a road trip to start over--fate turns everything upside down. A wild turn of events leaves her far from home along the Yorkshire coast, in the hospital, waking up from a concussion, believing her name is Sabrina Anderson. She doesn't know where she's come from, but she feels she could heal in that seaside town, with the fresh air, seagulls, and a few kind strangers who take her into their lives. And into the heart of their joyful, boisterous Italian family restaurant--run by Teddy, the warmhearted son of her new landlady. When the restaurant is threatened, she knows she has the skills to help--and as her memory slowly returns, she must choose between Sabrina's life or Polly's. With her identity in question, Polly wonders: what if this new life could truly be hers? What if she could rewrite her story with a happier ending?Previously published in the UK as The Happiest Ever After.
Ma Hennigan's Chambers
The barristers in the city are mainly housed in comfortable, well-equipped chambers owned by their governing body. Directly opposite, surrounded by high rise office blocks is a remnant of jollier times. Ma Hennigan's Chambers is a former house of notorious fame where Tommy, grandson of the great madam Ma Hennigan, presides over a set of barely legal chambers where the law is practiced, songs are sung, and toasts are drunk. It is inevitable that there will be a collision of wills between the clots and the cream. The author has written a hilarious romp through the tangle of government, law and policing.
About Love
Little Clothbound Classics: irresistible mini editions of short stories, novellas, and essays from the world's greatest writers, designed by the award-winning Coralie Bickford-SmithA Penguin Classics Hardcover From a writer widely considered to be one of greatest ever of the form, Anton Chekhov's short stories offer unforgettable character, crystalline expression, and deep, powerful mystery. Collected here are five of his very best tales, "The Lady with the Little Dog," "The House with the Mezzanine," and the trilogy "The Man in the Case," "Gooseberries," and "About Love."
When the Man Dances
Neal Pilchard, an unemployed English professor, is hired to drive a venture capitalist's luxury car from North Carolina to Chicago. Along the way he crashes while drag racing, gets himself in a dangerous entanglement with a repo man's wife, and rescues the capitalist's ne'er-do-well son from a pair of mob enforcers. But this is just the beginning of Neal's misadventures. The simple driveaway turns into a race across the country, a wild ride through crime, violence, role-playing, and romance.
Curio's Carnival
When Primula Wallace decides to run for Chair of the Parish Council, and Abigail steps up to oppose her, she suddenly finds herself gaining popularity. The fear of the oppressive Primula at the helm, wins her approval and support for the first time in ten years. With a new found confidence, she takes a huge leap of faith, and her life takes a surprising turn for the better. Her fellow Curio's join her, and plan the biggest thing to ever happen in Wotton Dursley. Everything is riding on the success of the Curio's as Abigail takes the lead, pushing Chloe into the limelight, and with Edwina's advanced skills, they plan to astound the village, and hopefully win the election in what is a campaign of smears and lies aimed against her. There are fun and frolics once again, as the Curio's go all out, in what is the most imaginative and creative story of the Curio's so far. A thrilling and captivating read, that will leave you breathless and wanting more, in his best Curio story to date, from Robin John Morgan.
