28 Days Sassier
The last man on Earth.Bigfoot.Goblins.When humanity fled to another dimension, Jim Tiptree got left behind to deal with concrete-eating goblins.It's already a bummer... then Bigfoot shows up.A humorous post-apocalyptic tale about Bigfoot, goblins from Hopkinsville, and a man who just wants to open his canned pasta.
Say Hello to My Little Friend
Finalist for the Kirkus Prize Scarface meets Moby Dick in Say Hello to My Little Friend--"a masterclass in pace and precision...brilliant" (Nana Kwame Adjei-Brenyah, National Book Award Finalist of Chain Gang All Stars) about a young man's attempt to capitalize on his mother's murky legacy--a story steeped in Miami's marvelous and sinister magic. Failed Pitbull impersonator Ismael Reyes--you can call him Izzy--might not be the Scarface type, but why should that keep him from trying? Growing up in Miami has shaped him into someone who dreams of being the King of the 305, with the money, power, and respect he assumes comes with it. After finding himself at the mercy of a cease-and-desist letter from Pitbull's legal team and living in his aunt's garage, Izzy embarks on an absurd quest to turn himself into a modern-day Tony Montana. When Izzy's efforts lead him to the tank that houses Lolita, a captive orca at the Miami Seaquarium, she proves just how powerful she and the water surrounding her really are--permeating everything from Miami's sinking streets to Izzy's memories to the very heart of the novel itself. What begins as Izzy's story turns into a super-saturated fever dream as sprawling and surreal as the Magic City, one as sharp as an iguana's claws, and as menacing as a killer whale's teeth. As the truth surrounding Izzy's boyhood escape from Cuba surfaces, the novel reckons with the forces of nature, with the limits and absence of love, and with the dangers of pursuing a tragic inheritance. "Blistering, hilarious, [and] tragic" (The Miami Herald), Say Hello to My Little Friend is Jennine Cap籀 Crucet's most daring, heartbreaking, and fearless book yet.
Dodgy Dates and a Dinosaur
Single-parent and daydreamer Sophie steps back out into the crazy world of dating and finds that there really are plenty more fish in the sea, but none that she would really want to catch. A year later with her self-esteem at an all-time-low she shelves the plan, maybe her idea of a fairy-tale ending didn't need to include a prince after all. "A great debut""Brilliant book.... funny, intelligent and a must read- I couldn't put it down""A funny and entertaining read""Elizabeth Ball is a wonderful writer who knows how to keep the story flowing""Sophie is everything you would want in a chick-lit character- funny, prone to mishaps but loveable.... I missed her when I finished the book"
"We Go Camping!"
"We go camping!", is not your typical camping holiday! Divorcee John is about to 'lose' his daughter when she announces she is going to live abroad with her mother. Morris, Eddie and Gary three unreliable mates, want to help John find alternative focus, and they decide a camping holiday is the perfect tonic. Theoretically, camping should be relatively easy to organise and execute, but four grown men demonstrate reality is something quite different. They provide a masterclass in lack of organisation, and creating bizarre situations. What follows is a catalogue of adventures and mishaps, involving an ambulance emergency, a hospital trip, a game involving manure, a bull, eviction, and a sea burial, to name but a few! Add to all of this, that one of the four has a secret no one could have foreseen, and also the merest hint of a holiday romance, and it's amazing what can be packed into a two week camping holiday.
Convenient Beauty
Convenient Beauty(A Beauty Regency Novella, Book 3) NO ONE WOULD SAVE HIM NOW...Lord Cayden Knights, Fifth Earl of Caswell, resented attending social events, after suffering the loss of a dearest friend, enjoyments seem like a betrayal. His life became meaningless until one night, a beautiful dark-haired, insufferable, nuisance of a lady invaded his life, disturbing whatever plans he had to change his life. EXCEPT, A DAMSEL IN DISTRESS'Princess Rosemary Of Blackmane, needs to get married, ' were the words of her grandmother and those awful words had sent Rosemary in a whirlwind of never-ending social events, leaving no time to pursue her writing. But when she unexpectantly meets a young earl who seems to need help as well, only her brilliant ideas and quick wit may save them all. Don't miss the other books in the Beauty Regency Series Hidden Beauty(Book 1)Blind Beauty(Book 2)
Why Should You Doubt Me Now?
The Virgin Mary had made an untoward appearance in Dublin. Is she real? Is she a hoax? Mary Breasted's gift for poking fun where it hurts the most has produced an irreverent, irrepressible, unforgettable book. Ireland will never be the same. "Breasted's perfectly aimed dialogue and brisk action skewer the jumbled politics--sexual, religious and marital, in academia and the governing Dail--that shape life in modern Ireland." - Publishers Weekly
Friends Don't
A heartfelt and hilarious romantic comedy, loosely inspired by While You Were Sleeping.As the oldest of three sisters, Poppy Kasper doesn't remember a time when she wasn't the glue holding her siblings-and their lives-together. So moving across the country to Cashmere Cove, the hometown of her new boyfriend, is completely out of character. Add in the fact that said boyfriend is leaving for a months-long pro-golf tour, and it's enough to make Poppy question her sanity. But it's fine. Everything's fine. She can still be a good sister from a distance, and she'll keep the spark in her relationship alive with calls, texts, and old fashioned love notes. See? Fine.Quiet and serious Mack Bradley is used to playing second fiddle to his famous younger brother, especially since his own reputation was ruined nearly a decade ago. He's made his peace with his circumstances, but when his brother begs him to show his new girlfriend the Cashmere Cove ropes, and then ups the ante with an even bigger request to stand in as her pen pal, Mack finds himself thrown into the path of the effervescent Poppy Kasper. She's his foil in every way...she also makes him feel things he's never felt before.A summer of pranks, late-night swims, and stargazing finds Poppy and Mack forging an unlikely friendship-one built on laughter and pushing each other to see life in a different light. But when Poppy's relationship with Mack's brother unravels, will she leave town? Or is there another reason for her to stay?After all, friends don't fall in love...do they?(Friends Don't is the first book in the Fall In Love series, which follows three sisters as they find love after moving across the country to the small town of Cashmere Cove, Wisconsin. This is a closed door romcom with plenty of sizzling chemistry and romantic tension, but no spice.)
Coffin Dodger
When your favorite actors aren't acting, they're dealing with ghost-snakes, giant crocodiles, spiders with human faces, and cults kidnapping them. One of these cults kidnaps a group of actors from a cult classic horror series. This cult forces the group to play a game where they have to face their biggest fears in order to gain eternal life. They don't even want eternal life. It's all pretty inconvenient.
Last Gasp Motel
When retired maintenance man Frank Sinatra finds Darell Willows's body in the swimming pool of the Last Gasp Motel in Omnipodge, California, Frank must deal with the responding police officer making wisecracks about his name while trying to figure out what happened.Detective Duke Lambert arrives and quizzes Frank. Frank agrees to help the detective, whom he has worked with before. Suspects include the residents of the Last Gasp and the son and daughter-in-law of the unpopular victim.The aging residents are a quirky lot including chain-smoking manager Hedda Robinson; kleptomaniac Carolyn Bryant; "Accident" Al Utley, who causes traffic accidents and then collects money from the other drivers; dog-poop vigilante Pat Pope known as "Mr. Poop"; good Samaritan Mira Neighbors; potassium-obsessed, banana-chomping Banny Zamora; flower petal-scattering Gladys Terry; womanizer Caruthers Quinter; authority-avoiding Varenka; and conspiracy-theory nut Ethel Ogden. Each of the suspects argued recently with the deceased-and all of them have reasons to want him dead. The eccentric tenants must work together to solve the case before the city demolishes the place they call home and replaces it with a shopping mall-the race is on to find the killer and save the Last Gasp Motel!
Low Country Lamentations
A new novel by the author of Recondite Oblivion. "A striking, character-driven tale . . ." Kirkus Reviews When news of her long-lost brother's reappearance reaches Savannah D'Bergeolet, she begins a quest to uncover the many secrets that surround both him and their childhood in the South Carolina low country. For her, and her friends and family who are dragged into the ever-thickening plot, things will never be the same.
The Wisdom of Beasts and Boogeymen
"...punctuated by broad humor and a healthy sense of the absurd." KirkusThe thunderous roar of beasts Once made them supreme on earth!But as modern noise increased, Roars aren't what they used to be worth.Now humans rule the Universe!We've knocked the beasts down a peg.Yeah, it looks pretty good in verse, But a dog will still whiz on your leg.That's to remind the human race, And ponder while your pant leg is oozing, There still is no safe space.Your pets will think that's amusing.
The Citadel of Bureaucracy
Part story, part game, this is a book in which YOU make all the decisions!The Citadel of Bureaucracy holds dark and dangerous perils for civil servants unprepared for its labyrinthine cubicle walls, but enter you must. The Albatross Pay System has shorted you, money's tight, and long hours have left you ragged and in desperate need of a vacation. You've just got to make it through one more day. But it won't be easy. Packed with asbestos, bad wiring, and with air quality equivalent to a dank, rat-infested dungeon, the Darby Complex, known as "The Citadel" to its hapless inmates, is riddled with appalling hazards and frantic civil servants to test you beyond all reasonable limits.Working against the clock, you must fight unreliable transit, dodgy I.T., the dreaded Canada goose, and a rising sense of nihilism in an effort to get paid and clear your desk before your vacation. YOU decide which paths to take, which dangers to risk, and which colleagues to confront. May the blessings of the Janus-faced God of Finance and H.R. be with you, for you'll find little succour in the Citadel's unhallowed halls.
Behind the Bar
A humorous drink recipe book about what not to do when you're a customer in a bar.Johnny Metheny, aka Johnny Love, opened a series of successful and legendary bars and grills in California called Johnny Love's. He is one of San Francisco's best-known bartenders and a seasoned expert on the nightlife scene. Metheny got his nickname, "Johnny Love," while a freshman at the University of California, Berkeley. He received his degree in Economics from Cal, was a member of three national championship rugby teams, and became a licensed stockbroker, but his true calling has been as a bartender, club owner, and purveyor of fine spirits. Metheny was inducted into The Bartender's Hall of Fame by Bartender's Magazine. In 2004, Metheny sold his restaurants and clubs to launch Johnny Love Vodka, a line of flavored and ultra-premium American vodkas. In 2009, Metheny partnered in the launch of the first Sugar-Free, Gluten Free vodka, Devotion. Metheny wrote a screenplay about four guys that bartend together in San Francisco and a book entitled "Guide To Bar Etiquette" which is a humorous look at the things bar customers unknowingly do that annoy bar staff. Metheny then went back to his passion, bars and restaurants. Johnny Love was part of the team that purchased The Blue Light Caf矇 from Boz Skaggs in 1991, which he sold his stake a year later to open Johnny Love's, and in 2015 he repurchased The Blue Light from his old partners. The Blue Light's name recognition and sales figures have increased significantly, and in 2023 The Blue Light became a Legacy Business in San Francisco. Metheny currently also owns Toy Soldier, a successful restaurant on Belden Place as well as the Latin Steakhouse next door. In addition, Metheny owns a Bed and Breakfast in Santa Cruz, CA, by the beach and boardwalk.
Behind the Bar
A humorous drink recipe book about what not to do when you're a customer in a bar.Johnny Metheny, aka Johnny Love, opened a series of successful and legendary bars and grills in California called Johnny Love's. He is one of San Francisco's best-known bartenders and a seasoned expert on the nightlife scene. Metheny got his nickname, "Johnny Love," while a freshman at the University of California, Berkeley. He received his degree in Economics from Cal, was a member of three national championship rugby teams, and became a licensed stockbroker, but his true calling has been as a bartender, club owner, and purveyor of fine spirits. Metheny was inducted into The Bartender's Hall of Fame by Bartender's Magazine. In 2004, Metheny sold his restaurants and clubs to launch Johnny Love Vodka, a line of flavored and ultra-premium American vodkas. In 2009, Metheny partnered in the launch of the first Sugar-Free, Gluten Free vodka, Devotion. Metheny wrote a screenplay about four guys that bartend together in San Francisco and a book entitled "Guide To Bar Etiquette" which is a humorous look at the things bar customers unknowingly do that annoy bar staff. Metheny then went back to his passion, bars and restaurants. Johnny Love was part of the team that purchased The Blue Light Caf矇 from Boz Skaggs in 1991, which he sold his stake a year later to open Johnny Love's, and in 2015 he repurchased The Blue Light from his old partners. The Blue Light's name recognition and sales figures have increased significantly, and in 2023 The Blue Light became a Legacy Business in San Francisco. Metheny currently also owns Toy Soldier, a successful restaurant on Belden Place as well as the Latin Steakhouse next door. In addition, Metheny owns a Bed and Breakfast in Santa Cruz, CA, by the beach and boardwalk.
If That Was Lunch, We've Had It
Listen up, people! Rodney here. This book is about me and my mate Will and our attempts to write a book. I hope you get the irony because this book is a test of your sense of humor. Not everyone can write a book (or have a sense of humor - just read the reviews) which may or may not include me, but I'm not spilling the beans on that at this early stage of our relationship. Anyway, in the book, Will and I spend a lot of time avoiding responsibility and real work, which, in my humble opinion, is what most people want to do but won't admit to. We ricochet around lots of jobs like hospital orderly, farm worker, merchant seaman, lawyer, and pineapple picker in lots of different places like Australia, New Zealand, Saudi Arabia, Jordan, Singapore, the UK, Canada, and the USA, and we play a lot of sport, and I waste some time dating nurses. But in the end ...no, sorry, you'll just have to read for yourself what happens in our climate-challenged, topsy-turvy, scandal-mongered world where we're all wondering who will be first up against the wall when the revolution comes. In the meantime, eat chocolate fish (an Antipodean delicacy), read like a demon, and don't spare the hubris. (What on earth does that mean you say? Don't ask me, I'm just a character.) And don't forget to check in regularly to see updated blurbs from me. Catch the cosmo flow, bro, Rodney "I've been thinking, bro, maybe we should join a writers' group." Rodney, surprisingly, sounded serious. "What for? I've been to a writers' group. It was called school." "We need a catalyst." "I'd rather chew barbed wire." "I've heard a lot of women go to writers' groups." Kim bit into a celery stick wrapped in a lettuce leaf. "Sign me up." I wasn't stupid.
Bad Day in a Banana Hammock
Zach wakes up with no memory, no phone, and no clothes except his stripper g-string. And oh yeah! There's that pesky naked dead guy in bed next to him. Problem is Zach's not gay. Or a murderer. At least, he doesn't think so. Only one person can help him, his sister, Zora. Of course Zora's got problems of her own-she has three kids at home and is eight months pregnant with the fourth. So she's a bit cranky. But that's not going to stop her from helping her brother. With kids in tow, the siblings set out to find the true killer, clear Zach's name, and reassure Zach he's not gay. ***** "An hilarious murder mystery romp. Ride along with Zach and Zora on this most entertaining of mysteries." -Heather Brainerd, author of the Jose Picada, P.I. mystery series "A fun, quirky whodunit so full of wild antics, it will keep you guessing...when you're not giggling." -Heather Greenis, author of The Natasha Saga "Bad Day in a Banana Hammock will have you wiping up tears of hysterical laughter." -Suzanne de Montigney, author of the Shadow of the Unicorn series
Murder by Massage
Zach, the friendly neighborhood "male entertainer dancer," is back and mixed up in another suspicious murder case! But just like last time, big sister, Zora-private investigator supreme-comes to the rescue, complete with four kids in tow. Nuttiness, chaos, and mystery ensue as Zach and Zora race against the clock to prove his innocence. No clue is too big, no clue is too small. Even if it involves dancing cops, ex-radical hippy militants, pompous pastors, or a creepy set of "Furries" (don't ask!)
Isn't Life Strange?
This book that I wrote was due to humorous thoughts that came to mind as I was coming off竅 medication prescribed by my psychiatrist. I was busy taking notes and drawing funny images on my computer. I was having the best time of my life trying to make light of the otherwise stressful world we live in. Just needed to have some fun poking at certain situations that would pop into my mind. Life is too short not to see the humor in it and realize that if we can laugh at ourselves and others we can heal from past hurts and move forward! I'd like to thank my Lord Jesus for giving me the opportunity to find humor in this life and to share the love and joy to others. I feel really blessed!!
Vastness of Pace
Luke and Melissa, newlyweds, live temporarily in the Provence, France on an assignment from Luke's employer in the States. They live to make each other happy and their life is calm and relaxed.An invitation to a wedding in Cholet from Melissa's friend seems to be a wonderful opportunity for a relaxed trip through France. A blue-sky day sets a relaxed start to their trip. However, an unexpected traffic jam, an eighteen-wheeler on one side and concrete barriers forcing them to merge into its lane, forgotten wedding clothes, running low on gas late at night high up in the mountains, reckless driving on Luke's part, not merely minor damages to the car, and other incidences turn their life, moods, and emotions upside down. The tension not only tests their patience but their love for each other and their relationship.What valuable lessons will they learn about themselves and each other? Will this trip, turned chaotic and stressful, emotions flying high, end in separation or bring them closer together?It seems impossible to mix humor with the high pressure, chaos, and strained emotions; but fasten seat-belts and get ready for an exciting ride.
Masterpieces Of American Wit And Humor
As the title claims, the book is a real collection of the best examples of the American humorous literature. The editor gathers valuable pieces by the prominent authors like Washington Irving, Benjamin Franklin, Mark Twain and many more. It was compiled at the turn of the 19th and 20th century and its aim was to bring relaxing notes into the craze for moral seriousness in all literature, which was characteristic of that period. CONTENTS AGNES REPPLIER - A Plea for Humor MARIETTA HOLLEY - An Unmarried Female FITZHUGH LUDLOW - Selections from a Brace of Boys ROBERT JONES BURDETTE - Rheumatism Movement Cure OLIVER WENDELL HOLMES - An Aphorism and a Lecture JOSHUA S. MORRIS - The Harp of a Thousand Strings SEBA SMITH - My First Visit to Portland WILLIAM CULLEN BRYANT - The Mosquito JOHN CARVER - Country Burial-places DANFORTH MARBLE - The Hoosier and the Salt-pile ANNE BACHE - The Quilting FITZ-GREENE HALLECK - A Fragment Domestic Happiness CHARLES F. BROWNE - ("Artemus Ward") One of Mr. Ward's Business Letters On "Forts" JAMES RUSSELL LOWELL - Without and Within LOUISA MAY ALCOTT - Street Scenes in Washington ALBERT BIGELOW PAINE - Mis' Smith JAMES JEFFREY ROOHE - A Boston Lullaby CHARLES GRAHAM HALPINE - Irish Astronomy SAMUEL MINTURN PEOK - Bessie Brown, M. D. ROBERT C. SANDS - A Monody CAROLYN WELLS - The Poster Girl JAMES GARDNER SANDERSON - The Conundrum of the Golf Links HARRIET BEECHER STOWE - The Minister's Wooing WILLIAM DEAN HOWELLS - Mrs. Johnson ANONYMOUS - The Trout, the Cat and the Fox The British Matron
Fatherhood for Fuckheads
Behold, Fuckhead, what you have become: A FATHER.A DAD. But what's that noise? To whom do you speak at night and who's that devil telling you about that lady over who's got a hell of an rump on her? Don't forget about those boobs of hers and how they deliciously joggle as she shifts; don't forget about those beers in the fridge, how cold they are and how they'll make you tingle from your head down to your tootsies. His name is Ken, and he is loud, and he is you, and you must kill him so your family might thrive. Will you survive?
Naked Ambition
"You're a politician, a public figure. What on earth were you thinking?" Up-and-coming junior minister Gregory Buchanan has had a portrait painted of himself by the acclaimed artist Sophie White--a painting she intends to enter in this year's Archibald Prize. Until then, Gregory has hung it in pride of place on his dining-room wall. It's a life-sized standing portrait, practically photographic in nature. And it's a nude. His wife will be home soon and he thinks the painting will be a pleasant surprise. Even more surprising will be an unexpected accumulation of guests: his sardonic mother, his fundamentalist mother-in-law, his lesbian sister, and the state governor, Louisa Wetherly--a senior government member has just resigned in scandalous circumstances, and she needs Gregory to step into the spotlight ahead of the coming election. It's going to be a wild afternoon, and an even wilder campaign--to do something about Gregory's naked ambition.
Low Country Lamentations
A new novel by the author of Recondite Oblivion. "A striking, character-driven tale . . ." Kirkus Reviews When news of her long-lost brother's reappearance reaches Savannah D'Bergeolet, she begins a quest to uncover the many secrets that surround both him and their childhood in the South Carolina low country. For her, and her friends and family who are dragged into the ever-thickening plot, things will never be the same.
Crushin' Candy
So damn sweet, I cause cavities.S'up? I'm Candy. Excuse the name. Mom was a stripper back in her prime and I was a client gone wrong. Now stuck behind the bar, she was eager for me to join the family business. No thanks. The only circles I run in are the ones my bubblegum bubbles make. Don't worry about my teeth though, sugar-free as always. I'm not a complete psycho. Oh, except for my passive-aggressive, potty-mouthed, imaginary best friend who happens to be a gummy bear. That part is pretty nuts.I was thoroughly enjoying myself, doing whatever the hell I wanted until a group of model-worthy bikers try to muscle in on my heist. They don't seem to realise those with barely any personal belongings tend to grow protective of what's theirs, and by taking one of my beloved possessions, they've signed their own death warrants.Fooling them with a sickly sweet smile, I'll slip past their defences and claim back what's rightfully mine, no matter the cost. Putting bullies back in their place when no one else can is my speciality. No one screws over Candy Crystal twice. P.S, yeah - stripper name game is on point.Trigger Warning: This is book one of the I Love Candy series, featuring a feisty female lead. Candy is spontaneous, impulsive and reckless, which makes this book inappropriate for under 18's. She gives as good as she gets, causing chaos and leaves you wondering who is bullying who! Expect excessive amounts of steam, violence and cursing throughout. This series is a Why Choose trilogy with a HEA...eventually.
Dashboard Elvis Is Dead
A failed writer connects the murder of an American journalist, a drowned 80s musician and a Scottish politician's resignation, in a heart-wrenching novel about ordinary people living in extraordinary times. Renowned photo-journalist Jude Montgomery arrives in Glasgow in 2014, in the wake of the failed Scottish independence referendum, and it's clear that she's searching for someone. Is it Anna Mason, who will go on to lead the country as First Minister? Jamie Hewitt, guitarist from eighties one-hit wonders The Hyptones? Or is it Rabbit - Jude's estranged foster sister, now a world-famous artist? Three apparently unconnected people, who share a devastating secret, whose lives were forever changed by one traumatic night in Phoenix, forty years earlier... Taking us back to a school shooting in her Texas hometown, and a 1980s road trip across the American West - to San Francisco and on to New York - Jude's search ends in Glasgow, and a final, shocking event that only one person can fully explain...
Funny Cartoons and Insightful Sayings
Here's my book "Funny Cartoons and Insightful Sayings." I drew and wrote this book so people can get a laugh out of it. We all need a laugh from time to time. I'm 90 years old and loved doing the book. Pick up a book and have a laugh . . . ha ha ha!
Prejudice
PREJUDICE is a storyline that tells the tale of conflicts resulting from misgivings between faiths, cultures, generations and social classes. this novel brings before us the struggles that everyone can honestly identify with as it tells of people who strive earnestly to break loose from such shackles; sometimes successfully, other times getting into deeper struggles as a result.This novel is a pleasant narrative anyone would like to read from start to finish, the plots are very tight and full of suspense- it is a skilful piece of art indeed.Prejudice uses three major families to graphically display the happenings going on in the country Nigeria and the challenges they face in the greatly diverse country.
Confessions of a Predatory Lender
The year is 2006 and everyone knows you can make a killing in mortgage lending. Christy and Megan, two small-town girls from the Palouse region of Eastern Washington, arrive in Seattle with newly minted finance degrees and dollar signs in their eyes. Both are eager to grab their chance at becoming mortgage loan officers. If only they can pass the training class! "Good girl" Christy is our guide through the maze of predatory lending with BFF Megan her ever-present and irreverent sidekick. Together, they're an irresistible combination as they love, shop, and lend their way through this hilarious novel toward an ending we're all too familiar with.
Caf矇 Chronicles
Funny, dark, quirky, warm are just some of the adjectives used to describe this collection of 27 stories written and set in 27 different cafes from Buenos Aires, Chicago, Bogot獺, New York, and other cities. These deeply personal tales came from several years of travel to different parts of the Americas. Each story was inspired by a different cafe and gives the reader a chance to visit those cafes and experience, if only briefly, the universal in the local.
Mustang To Paducah
It's 1969. A spur-of-the-moment road trip. A borrowed car. A dubious destination. Two flaky hippies. What could possibly go wrong? Everything.Cruiser and Peanut, two aimless Miami stoners, are returning a car for a tourist from Kentucky who's gone romping on his new lover's yacht. Arriving at their destination, the pair stumble onto a multiple murder. Before long, the duo are on the lam as the prime suspects with an unhinged FBI agent and a mob contract killer hot on their trail.Nestled slyly into this madcap road trip is the cultural awakening of two young Miami refugees, one from Cuba, the other from Georgia. Being a hippie is more a fashion statement than a lifestyle for Cruiser and Peanut, the offspring of working-class parents who, like most migrants, came to Miami seeking a better life. After venturing outside their inner-city world for the first time, the pair discover a form of hippie heresy: The flower child ethos of dropping out and going back to the land feels less like liberation and more like a step back to the hardships their parents fled in Havana and Waycross.
The Great Social Security Heist
"A lot of people in America think there is a trust-that we take your money in payroll taxes and then we hold it for you and then when you retire, we give it back to you, but that's not the way it works. There is no trust fund-just IOUs that I saw firsthand." - President George W. BushYou're right, Mr. President. A lot of people in America still think that, but what you probably don't know is that back in 1972 when Nixon was president, the war de jour was Vietnam, and I was wearing bell-bottoms, four of the U's in those IOUs came looking for their money. I'm talking about a bunch of over-the-hill seventy year-olds: a WWI vet who paid his dues in the trenches of Europe, a small-time crook who paid his in regular installments behind bars, a hotheaded Irishman who thought dues were don'ts, and a giant gorilla who... well... He's a gorilla. Gorillas don't pay dues, and they usually get what they want.And then there's me. I'm Danny Maxwell. I went along for the ride. You'll never guess what happened, but if you hit that BUY button and I'll tell you the whole story.
If at First You Don't Succeed, Fly Again
What do you do when a career in family history turns your life into a mystery? At last Caity Shaw is engaged to her Irish love, Declan. However, rather than planning their future together, she is stuck organizing other couples' weddings and special events at her uncle's English estate. Desperate to escape the manor's media frenzy due to the home's recent appearance on a popular TV show, Caity quits despite her sister Rachel's objection. To everyone's surprise, including her own, Caity hires her former coworker and archenemy as her replacement. Shortly after returning home to Declan in Ireland's tranquil countryside, Caity lands a job assisting a renowned probate genealogist, a.k.a. heir hunter. Her first task is to deliver a family heirloom to a beneficiary in Scotland. What seems like a simple courier job soon has Caity involved in an intriguing family mystery. Caity's wedding plans are put on hold and her genealogy skills are put to the test when she must solve the mystery to save her and her boss's reputation.
Sunshine on My Mind
AUGUST 1977...A time when Elvis was king, Iceland had recently won the bitterly disputed 'Cod Wars' - and Hull City started a new football season that would ultimately end in relegation.For 12-year-old Tony, it meant going to East Yorkshire for two weeks of holiday and spending time with caring relatives who doted on him.All the ingredients were in place for a memorable vacation. After all, what could possibly go wrong in just 14 days?Critical praise for Philip Yorke's writing: "The kind of novel one could read over and over again.""A gem.""I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It has a warm heart and is very funny."
Alya Sometimes Hides Her Feelings in Russian, Vol. 3
Following their victory at the debate, Alya and Masachika have some downtime to strategize for the upcoming closing ceremony. But can you really call an impromptu lunch date, hypnosis chaos, and vigorous study sessions "downtime"? Either way, it draws to a close when Masachika suddenly gets sick. It's an opportunity for Alya to play nurse...but it's also a chance for Yuki to execute a sneak attack! As the semester comes to an end, Yuki and Masachika are going to ramp up their sibling rivalry!
New Support for the Backbone
The 'new support' is 18-year-old Bella Anstruther, just qualified as a medical secretary, embarking on her first job in St Regis District General Hospital in Chelsea, London. The 'backbone' refers to all the clerical and back office staff required to run the hospital. The book follows Bella's progress from a shaky start to successful promotion. As a floating bank secretary, she moves around departments and meets many interesting characters! Jill, her motherly supervisor, the Typing Poolers and other secretaries she works with, the jovial post-room boys including awkward Norman, desperate to ask her out, Lulabelle their statuesque and wise tea lady and Lottie "The Lush", an ex-medical secretary who is found in the pub over the road, to mention just a few. St Regis itself is suffering: the buildings require urgent repairs and the staff's morale is in decline due to poor conditions, low pay and terrible food. The Hospital Administrator, Frank Cumbridge, also new to St Regis, attempts to instigate management schemes but only adds to staff resentment. Little does he know that he is playing into the hands of the powers that be in the DHSS and their plan for St Regis. This is a light-hearted and affectionate reflection of life in a London hospital in the late 1970's and is book one of the Bella quartet. The characters and hospital are entirely fictional but are based on experiences and encounters during the author's early days working as an agency temp in London during the mid 1970s.
Cigar Boys
You have to be a certain type of individual to be a regular at a cigar shop. At the Box that statement couldn't be any truer. Those who frequent the Box are one sorry collection of humanity, and we here at the Box Burns Gazette love them for it. The Gazette was created in order to document all of the crazy stories and events that have happened at the Box and to its customers. So follow along as we detail all the shenanigans our friends and lovable losers manage to get themselves into in Cigar Boys: Stories from the Ashes, a collection of short stories by Lou Rossi.
The Therapist
Frank is a successful psychologist struggling to deal with a shady past and an unhealthy taste for alcohol.Late on a Friday, he counsels a man with an unbreakable masturbation addiction. But, the session leaves Frank feeling dislodged. His career and personal life begin to spiral out of control, and a series of mind-bending events leave Frank wondering if he is the therapist or the patient."The Therapist is a dark, funny ride through the mind of an intelligent man coming to terms with his past.""A jarring insight into the male libido""Disturbing, hopeful, funny and depressing" Frank T Bird is an indie author of unique psychological fiction. He was born in Northern England during the pre-Thatcher nineteen seventies. After failing at life for many years, he was then shipped off to Australia to fail at life in a warmer climate. The Therapist is Frank's second book.
She's In a Better Place
Jennifer Graham is struggling to make ends meet while running the Fairlawn Funeral Home, raising two children, and studying for her national board exam. Her work takes on a new dimension when Gerald Huffman, her assistant and mentor, reveals that he has a serious illness. When she learns that he and his daughter haven't spoken in years, Jen decides to help them reconcile . . . but things don't go exactly as she planned. Jennifer is longing for stability in her life . . . but she soon discovers that life isn't stagnant; it's always changing. Once again, the mortuary is a setting for lessons of laughter, love, and life.
An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman
I think, almost everybody will find something in this book to offend them. If you're upset by an Irish joke or disgusted by cursing, or believe some subjects are sacrosanct, then it's best to put the book down; now. If political correctness is important to you then it's also probably best not to proceed. If you're comfortable you're not racist, sexist or any other 'ist' and are prepared to accept it as it comes, even if you might consider a subject, or some of the language, a little dubious, you might find something to make you smile. This is a book of adaptions and interpretations of a few old jokes. Lest, because of modern mores and sensibilities, some oral traditions slip away or disappear through lack of telling. There are also four original short stories which may amuse. Disclaimer: Analysis tells me I share 39% of my DNA with those of Irish descent and 4% with European Jewish people. I was born in Hackney in East London, my paternal grandfather was Scottish and my maternal, Irish. Also, my forebears must have come out of Africa the same as everyone else.
Micromegas
Micromegas, has been considered important throughout human history. In an effort to ensure that this work is never lost, we have taken steps to secure its preservation by republishing this book in a modern format for both current and future generations. This complete book has been retyped, redesigned, and reformatted. Since these books are not scans of the authors' original publications, the text is readable and clear.
Lord Arthur Savile's Crime and Other Stories
Biting wit and lush descriptions combine in this striking new edition of Oscar Wilde's short story collection, which contains Wilde's most famous story, "The Canterville Ghost." Originally published in 1887 in the British literary magazine, The Court and Society Review. "Lord Arthur Savile's Crime: A Study of Duty" headlines this anthology, first published in 1891. In addition to the title work, Wilde added "The Canterville Ghost," "The Model Millionaire," and "The Sphinx Without a Secret." Editions dated after 1900 (including this one) also contain "The Portrait of Mr. W. H."In the 132 years since the publication of this collection, numerous actors, writers, and even musicians wrote adaptations of "The Canterville Ghost," the most popular of the stories in this volume. But those adaptations also made significant changes in the plot.Now with a foreword by Hugo-award nominee Paul Di Filippo, go back to the original. Read "The Canterville Ghost," and the other stories as Oscar Wilde wrote them.
Living the Dream - Life’s Outtakes 16
52 humorous/inspirational short stories, one for each week of the year, from the popular syndicated column, Life's Outtakes. From the humor of a city girl learning to teach in a rural school to her little sister in Teaching and Learning, to the heartwarming tale of playing Santa after a year of Covid, these stories will make you laugh, reminisce, and contemplate what matters most in life.
The Deli Diaries
Fresh out of art school with a pile of debt and a broken heart, Della moves into her parents' basement in suburban Nebraska and lands a "temporary" job as a deli clerk. Struggling to smile under the small talk of corporate commands, she contends with mind-numbing eight-hour shifts, bumbling management, ruthless secret shoppers, and a crew of misfit coworkers. Despite the monotonous drudgery, can Della stay true to herself and find creative inspiration in a life behind the counter? With inimitable quirkiness and fever dream flair, Ella Weber's debut novel is a hysterical yet heartfelt parody of millennial plight, Midwest mediocrity, overweening artistic ambition, and the inanity of the daily delicatessen grind. As inventive and entertaining as autofiction gets, The Deli Diaries is an unforgettable slice of life unafraid to ask the big questions: Who ham I? What ham I? Where ham I?Praise for The Deli Diaries: "A stream-of-consciousness tour through a shift that is at once one day and many days, with Della pontificating on life, reality shows, dating, the patriarchy, and everything in between." --Kirkus Reviews"Weber sees to the depths of America's depravity and manages to keep on laughing. The thing is to both see it and survive it, and somehow Ella Weber and her fictional alter ego, Della, the Sybil of the supermarket, has done this. Caustic and suave, serious and weightless, ecstatic and dangling over the abyss, The Deli Diaries is the Great American Novel I have been waiting for." --Sofi Thanhauser, author of Worn: A People's History of Clothing
Lord Arthur Savile's Crime and Other Stories
Biting wit and lush descriptions combine in this striking new edition of Oscar Wilde's short story collection, which contains Wilde's most famous story, "The Canterville Ghost." Originally published in 1887 in the British literary magazine, The Court and Society Review. "Lord Arthur Savile's Crime: A Study of Duty" headlines this anthology, first published in 1891. In addition to the title work, Wilde added "The Canterville Ghost," "The Model Millionaire," and "The Sphinx Without a Secret." Editions dated after 1900 (including this one) also contain "The Portrait of Mr. W. H."In the 132 years since the publication of this collection, numerous actors, writers, and even musicians wrote adaptations of "The Canterville Ghost," the most popular of the stories in this volume. But those adaptations also made significant changes in the plot.Now with a foreword by Hugo-award nominee Paul Di Filippo, go back to the original. Read "The Canterville Ghost," and the other stories as Oscar Wilde wrote them.
The Canterville Ghost
The Canterville Ghost is set in the English countryside in the late 19th century. Most of the story takes place in Canterville Chase, which is described as an old mansion with secret rooms and passageways, long corridors stained glass windows, and oak paneling. Pictures of long-dead Canterville ancestors, ancient tapestries, and a suit of armor add to the medieval-like setting. Overall, it seems to fit the stereotype of a haunted house.The book follows fairy tale conventions and Wilde introduces Virginia Otis, a fairy-tale type heroine. Otis must believe that there is a soul worth saving in the murderous and grisly Sir Simon. Her actions, however, lead to a happy ending. Otis marries a Duke and receives a casket of valuable jewels from the Ghost.
License to Die
"Haris Orkin has renewed not-so-secret agent John Flynn's license to thrill in this delightful mash-up of James Bond and Maxwell Smart in another charming, thrilling and amusing page-turner that makes me sad for the rest." -Mark A. Altman, author of Nobody Does It Better: The Complete Oral History of James BondHornitos State Mental Hospital houses the worst of the worst. Those convicted of violent criminal behavior and judged not guilty by reason of insanity. Mass murderers, serial killers, mad bombers, arsonists, terrorists, and now... James Flynn. Still convinced he's an international super spy, Flynn finds himself in the most dangerous predicament of his life.He faces off with old enemies, new enemies, and psycho killers who just want to watch the world burn. He also meets a fierce and beautiful woman who might be even more dangerous and delusional than he is.Together they walk a tightrope between objective reality and clinical insanity and, with the help of Flynn's reluctant sidekick, Sancho, uncover a mad plot to bring on Armageddon.
The Eunuch
Why would a eunuch want to write a secret history of life in the court of ancient Babylon's most famous king? To get back at his brother: that's why. Abducted as young boys by soldiers during the conquest of Nineveh, the brothers Uruk and Nergal receive very different fates in the ancient kingdom of Babylon. Uruk enjoys favors and climbs the Ziggurat of power to become a trusted advisor and the chief propaganda minister of King Nebuchadnezzar II, while Nergal is castrated and assigned to keep records of the daily life of the King's harem. While Uruk's cushioned prosperity is enviable, his real life is anxious because the King is viewed as the Divine Plowman who must seed the land and bring forth a bountiful harvest -- in other words, make whoopie in the harem and father many children because as the King's virility goes, so goes the harvest -- but the King is both crazy and chronically impotent, and a severe drought has withered the grain fields of the kingdom, so Uruk works nervously to spin propaganda into the official court records to hide the real state of affairs. Mostly out of contempt for his brother and his brother's official history, but also partly because of a deep respect for truth, Nergal the eunuch decides to write his his own secret, eye-witness, tell-all account of the real life inside the court of King Nebuchadnezzar, in all of its hilarious and embarrassing unseemliness. All goes well until, at a crucial moment during a high festival orgy, the King calls for Nergal to assist him in performing a mating ritual with a harem concubine chosen to be the symbolic holy bride of Babylon. Eager to please the King his master, Nergal unexpectedly receives a caressing touch from the concubine, Siduri of Megiddo, and he nearly swoons with love for her. The moment turns Nergal's life upside down and tosses him in a nearly treasonous bind of mixed loyalties. Although he does not know it at the time, the moment changes not only Nergal's life but also everyone else's, because it is the first of a series of events that result in the collapse of the kingdom. So The Eunuch is a laugh-out-loud funny narrative that begins as an effort to extirpate the lies of the hagiographic official history of Babylon, becomes a story of a very peculiar love triangle between a King with mental health issues, an alluring and manipulative concubine, and an obsessive eunuch slave-scribe, and then ends by describing the fall of an empire.
Arms And The Man
Arms and the Man is a comedy by George Bernard Shaw, whose title comes from the opening words of Virgil's Aeneid, in Latin: Arma virumque cano. The play discusses how war is made, how it is fought, and how parties sue for peace at the close of it. Indeed, the play's title is a direct quote from Virgil's Aeneid, the Roman epic that glorifies war. George Bernard Shaw's three-act comedy, Arms and the Man, follows Raina Petkoff as she learns the reality of the world around her. Set during the Serbo-Bulgarian War of 1885, Shaw's play takes a critical look at the romanticizing of love and war, the challenges of self-reflections, and the gray world of absolute truth.
