Home Less In Dallas
A collection of true, short stories about a time in my life spent chasing a dream I simply wasn't ready to attain. I only knew two things: I was uncomfortable and in what seemed like a truly foreign land.As it turns out, I was just home less in Dallas.Hundreds of miles away and almost ten years later, here are some of the funny little lessons I learned being home less that we could ALL use.
(Un)Predictable Happiness
All of us have a spark of crazy inside of us. Some of us hide it in dark corner hoping to fit in. Some of us wear it as a shield to keep others out. And some of us play with our crazy with carefree abandon like a child finding the swings free at recess. In (Un)Predictable we follow the journey of the author as she learns to let her weird light shine, because some things are too big to hide and better celebrated. Unfortunately, all too soon she learns that there is a fine line between playing with your crazy and being played by your crazy. One of those experiences is no fun at all.
(Un)Predictable Happiness
All of us have a spark of crazy inside of us. Some of us hide it in dark corner hoping to fit in. Some of us wear it as a shield to keep others out. And some of us play with our crazy with carefree abandon like a child finding the swings free at recess. In (Un)Predictable we follow the journey of the author as she learns to let her weird light shine, because some things are too big to hide and better celebrated. Unfortunately, all too soon she learns that there is a fine line between playing with your crazy and being played by your crazy. One of those experiences is no fun at all.
That's Life (as we know it)
A collection of 49 short stories both thought provoking and humorous by the author of 7 previous collections, bringing his astonishing and somewhat inscrutable total to somewhere on the north side of 300 tales!
And Other Days of Nothing Much
This book is unpickupable. Just try it. "At times rollicking, laugh-out-loud funny, sweet, moving, gentle and bold. I loved every word and could hear Murphy's voice. His writing is true to his past, and to his present. Lucky readers have a treasure here."- Leslie Day, author, Field Guide to the Natural World of New York City
Turds of Wisdom
"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made." (Groucho Marx, no relation)If you've long suspected that the sacred and the profane exist in close proximity, this book's for you.What if the trials and vicissitudes of daily life could become the ground even for awakening? Can everyday neuroses actually become fuel for enlightenment?Here you will find stories of two kinds-episodes from Marx's personal life and mini-essays on particular topics of interest. Some are Buddhist-themed; some have nothing to do with Buddhism. Nothing is meant to be sequential, either chronologically or thematically. For those things, we recommend a good book.What if everything you're reading right now is just BS? "Who are you going to believe? Me or your own eyes?" (Groucho Marx)
All Butts Are Good Butts
Embrace your behind--flaws, farts, and all--with historical heinies, celebrity cabooses, seat self-care, and more fun facts in this little book of booty body positivity. Butts are amazing. They're practical, hilarious, and hardworking, and almost every person and animal has one that is entirely unique and their own. Just like a fingerprint, nothing makes you you like your backside. But why is it that so many of us have such a complicated relationship with our buns? Too big, too small, too high, too low... there's no such thing. This book is here to proclaim that all butts are good butts! From professional buttocks portraitist Rachal Duggan whose work has been seen on Instagram and TikTok (@radillustrates), this illustrated gift book examines all things bootylicious--from historical legends to adorable animals to otherworldly as*trology. For those in need of a little self-love, this book will cover fresh tactics to accept your perceived imperfections and easy strategies for honoring your cheeks. You'll laugh, you'll cry, and you'll (hopefully) see your glorious derri癡re in an entirely new light.
Can THIS Be the Perfect Pet?
El McMeen has found a new way to have fun with animals! It doesn't involve the petting zoo. It's playing with words! El's idea is to find animals whose names can be manipulated so that they would be ideal "pets" for certain people or personality types.For the gal who is always receiving calls from friends who are bored, the perfect pet might be the "Boredom Callee!" The guy at the gym who has pumped a little too much iron might like the "Brawntoosoreus" tagging along with him (were it not extinct).This book is a laugh-fest, eliciting appropriate groans and guffaws. And if you like the book, El's wife Sheila has the pet for you: the Punguin!
Saschaisms Anthology
The observations of a young man with an Autism Spectrum Disorder diagnosis. He is curious, witty and philosophical. This is a fun and thoughtful read covering his thoughts aged 10-18.
Start Without Me
The New York Times Bestseller!Named one of Vulture's "10 Best Comedy Books of 2022"From New York Times bestselling author, and Family Guy writer Gary Janetti comes Start Without Me, a collection of hilarious, laugh out loud, true life stories about the small moments that add up to a big life. Gary Janetti is bothered. By a lot of things. And thank God he's here to tell us. In Start Without Me, Gary returns with his acid tongue firmly in cheek to the moments and times that defined him. He takes us by the hand as we follow him through the summers he spends in his twenties, pursuing both the perfect tan and the perfect man to no avail and much regret. At his Catholic high school, he strikes up an unlikely friendship with a nun who shares Gary's love of soap operas, which becomes a salvation to them both. And don't get him started on how a bad hotel room can ruin even the best vacation. This laugh-out-loud collection of true-life stories from the man "behind his generation's greatest comedy" (The New York Times) is for anyone who has felt the joy in holding a decade-long grudge. Whether you are a new convert to Janetti or one of the million who follow him on social media for a daily laugh, Start Without Me will have you howling at Gary's frustrations and nodding along in agreement at the outrages of life's small slights. It's the literary equivalent of a night out with your funniest friend that you wish would never end.
Burnt Gloveboxes
Have you ever experienced a crazy mishap?How about a series of them? If so, then you'll appreciate Gina Ramsey's life, where outrageous blunders and misadventures happen all the time. From renegade turkeys to an escape artist dog who enjoys an occasional poo-poo platter, the stories in this book will not only crack you up, they'll have you appreciating the "normal" moments in your own life and embracing the funny in life's quirky circumstances. Burnt Gloveboxes: Embracing Life When It Goes Up in Flames is a cross between Murphy's Law and Chicken Soup for the Soul. If you love to laugh when things go sideways, this book is for you!
Criminal Rhyme
Humorous rhyme with irreverent, absurd, insane themes. Good for laughs.
We're Not here for the Hockey
Congratulations! You've traded in your weekends for endless hours at the rink and your bank account for expensive gear and tournament fees. Whether you're a seasoned hockey parent or a newbie just starting, this book covers all the quirks and idiosyncrasies of competitive youth hockey. With hilarious anecdotes, sarcastic observations, and plenty of relatable humor, you'll laugh out loud (and cry a little bit) at all the ups and downs of hockey parent life. This book takes readers on a journey of juggling a competitive sport's demands with a busy family's needs. Pour some coffee (or something a little stronger) and get ready.Topics covered include: Navigational tips for when things get more seriousHow not to be THAT parent every sports podcaster makes fun of (and avoid those who are)The off-season money pit (how not to lose your shirt)Surviving the drama and politics (every sport has 'em!)The thrill of watching your child succeed (and the agony of defeat)Strategies for dealing with awkward social settings that you've never experienced beforePractical advice and complicity for your maniaBut while We're Not Here for the Hockey is a comedic memoir, it's also heartfelt. L. Zukosky is a big believer in the power of sports to teach kids essential life lessons - teamwork, perseverance, and the value of hard work. There may be a few warranted jabs at the system and the coaches who think they are the next Herb Brooks, but the author knows how much hockey means to the players - and how much it means to the parents who watch them.We're Not Here for the Hockey is the ultimate survival guide for navigating the competitive hockey world or any other sport that dominates finances and free time. This book will surely resonate, and you'll be able to navigate the absurdities of youth sports with grace, humor, and a healthy dose of perspective.
Kayaks to Hell
Laugh out loud with this hilarious look at the trials and tribulations of paddling, as seen through the eyes of renowned cartoonist William Nealy.A celebrated author and cartoonist, William Nealy gained cult-hero status in the outdoor-sports community by blending his passion for the outdoors with his unique style of caricatures. He had a knack for learning-not by doing but by crashing and burning! The works of this American treasure were almost lost forever, but Menasha Ridge Press is proud to help bring back William's irreverent illustrations.Kayaks to Hell is a riot of a book that accurately depicts the monomania, elusive machismo, and marathon-dance mentality of whitewater paddling. With a unique blend of satire and cartoon art, the best-selling author opens up about the sport--and its disciples.Topics include: Boat racksCanoeing businessmenPaddling tripsWater rescuesMuch, much more!William's zany illustrations have been bound and bandaged together in a monumental new collection of books that include cartoons long out of print. Kayaks to Hell is a wonderful part of The William Nealy Collection, ideal for anyone who loves to laugh and enjoys the great outdoors.
How to Be Perfect
From the creator of The Good Place and the cocreator of Parks and Recreation, a hilarious, thought-provoking guide to living an ethical life, drawing on 2,400 years of deep thinking from around the world. Most people think of themselves as "good," but it's not always easy to determine what's "good" or "bad"--especially in a world filled with complicated choices and pitfalls and booby traps and bad advice. Fortunately, many smart philosophers have been pondering this conundrum for millennia and they have guidance for us. With bright wit and deep insight, How to Be Perfect explains concepts like deontology, utilitarianism, existentialism, ubuntu, and more so we can sound cool at parties and become better people. Schur starts off with easy ethical questions like "Should I punch my friend in the face for no reason?" (No.) and works his way up to the most complex moral issues we all face. Such as: Can I still enjoy great art if it was created by terrible people? How much money should I give to charity? Why bother being good at all when there are no consequences for being bad? And much more. By the time the book is done, we'll know exactly how to act in every conceivable situation, so as to produce a verifiably maximal amount of moral good. We will be perfect, and all our friends will be jealous. OK, not quite. Instead, we'll gain fresh, funny, inspiring wisdom on the toughest issues we face every day.
How to Be an Asshole Boss
Being a good leader is hard. Why not take the easy route and be an asshole boss? This guide will get you there quick and easy. How to Be an Asshole Boss is a satirical take on how to be a nightmare for your employees. This is a great gag-gift or a good way to let your boss know that they might need to re-evaluate their leadership style.
And God Laughs!
As I travel, watch television, and listen to hundreds of people in and out of hospitals in a wide range of communities, there is one major human experience that confronts us. Grief. Your own grief, the grief of friends, the grief of people you have never met, incidents of grief from major natural disasters, and from increasingly violent human interactions. Many talk therapists, available talk therapy and counselors, are involved in helping. Yet incidents of violent human aggression, deadly shootings and environmental abuse, rapidly rise. This book shows: 1.How humor played a positive role in the events and conflicts of many different religions. 2.How humor can be a form of self-care, of mindful meditation, and of grace. 3.How humor helps you cope with major loss, repeated devastations and bereavement. If you are not gifted as a stand-up comedian, this book is especially for you! Joseph McD Hepburn BA(Theol.), MA, MPhil, DTh, ACC. Joseph Hepburn is a retired Minister of Religion, after which he has served as a certified Hospital Chaplain for the past thirteen years. His hobbies include astronomy (yes there is humor in the skies too!), reading delightful and humorous narratives and biographies, and walking. Joseph earned a BA degree in Theology in Jamaica, with his project on the The Religious Implications of Humor in West Indian Society, a Master's degree in Ethics from Drew University, and a Doctoral degree in Clinical Pastoral Psychotherapy, with a dissertation on Humor as a tool in Collective and Cumulative Grief. After two marriages, two children, two grandchildren and two retirements, Joseph now serves as a per diem Chaplain in Hollywood, USA.
Help I S*xted My Boss
Should you tell your mum if you stumble across your dad on Grindr? How do you ask your mate for that 瞿 50 back? And what should you do if you've accidentally sexted your boss? Navigating the challenges of modern life can be tough! Now, thanks to the hit comedy podcast Help I Sexted My Boss, your 21st century dilemmas are solved. In this hilarious and essential handbook, William Hanson and Jordan North are on hand to help you find solutions to all of your awkward problems. William and Jordan are from very different worlds. William's a Southern etiquette consultant and expert in all things proper. Jordan's a Northern radio presenter and expert in all things common. Together they've entertained millions of podcast listeners across the world. From dinner parties to picky teas, first dates to flatmate dramas, now you can read brand new useful and useless advice from these unlikely best friends. Rooted in William's encyclopedic knowledge of manners and with lashings of down to earth honesty from Jordan, Help I Sexted My Boss is the book that helps you navigate the challenges of modern life.
Every time a bell rings...
This is an illustrated guide to the world of angels. It's got great illustrations and tons of great information on the day to day struggles of angels in a modern world. You won't be disappointed.
Communists In Outer Space
Why did communism go so wrong? In Communists in Outer Space (The Buzludzha Files) the reader soon comes to understand that communism was never intended to be an international struggle of the global proletariat but more of a universal attainment - literally. Socialism is and also was - intergalactic, and Joseph Starlin, the false prophet.
Alexandra Petri's Us History
As a columnist for the Washington Post, Alexandra Petri has watched in real time as those who didn't learn from history have been forced to repeat it. And repeat it. And repeat it. If we repeat history one more time, we're going to fail! Maybe it's time for a new textbook. Alexandra Petri's US History contains a lost (invented!) history of America. (A history for people disappointed that the only president whose weird sex letters we have is Warren G. Harding.) Petri's "historical fan fiction" draws on real events and completely absurd fabrications to create a laugh-out-loud, irreverent takedown of our nation's complicated past.On Petri's deranged timeline, John and Abigail Adams try sexting, the March sisters from Little Women are sixty feet tall, and Susan Sontag goes to summer camp. Nearly eighty short, hilarious pieces span centuries of American history and culture. Ayn Rand rewrites The Little Engine That Could. Nikola Tesla's friends stage an intervention when he falls in love with a pigeon. The characters from Sesame Street invade Normandy. And Mark Twain--who famously said reports of his death had been greatly exaggerated--offers a detailed account of his undeath, in which he becomes a zombie.This side-splitting work of historical humor shows why Alexandra Petri has been hailed as a "genius,"* a "national treasure,"+ and "one of the funniest writers alive"+.*Olivia Nuzzi, Katha Pollitt +Julia Ioffe, Katy Tur, John Scalzi, Chuck Wendig, Jamil Smith, and Susan Hennessey +Randall Munroe
Saurav- The story teller (Life diaries)
This is a non-fiction book based on the true incidents encountered by the author in his life. The author stayed in a residential military school i.e., "Sainik School Goalpara(SSG), Assam" from class VI to class-XII and again stayed in hostel for 5 years for his engineering degree from "Jorhat Engineering College, Assam". So, as a whole this book will reflect different incidents happened in his 12 years of hostel life apart from his experiences in staying different parts of the country (India) for his professional career. The book contains a lucid explanation of the author's stay in different parts of the country like Vizag (Vishakhapatnam, AP), Kanpur (UP), Korba (Chhattisgarh) and Nazira (Assam) for his professional career and how he mixed up with local people.
Principia Discordia
2023 Reprint of an undated U.S. Edition. Full facsimile of the original edition and not reproduced with Optical Recognition Software. The Principia Discordia is the first published Discordian religious text. It was written by Greg Hill (Malaclypse the Younger) with Kerry Wendell Thornley (Lord Omar Khayyam Ravenhurst) and others. The first edition was printed allegedly using Jim Garrison's Xerox printer in 1963. The second edition was published under the title Principia Discordia or How The West Was Lost in a limited edition of five copies in 1965. The phrase Principia Discordia, reminiscent of Isaac Newton's 1687 Principia Mathematica, is presumably intended to mean Discordant Principles, or Principles of Discordance.The Principia describes the Discordian Society and its Goddess Eris, as well as the basics of the POEE denomination of Discordianism. It features typewritten and handwritten text intermixed with clip art, stamps, and seals appropriated from other sources. While the Principia is full of literal contradictions and unusual humor, it contains several passages which propose that there is serious intent behind the work, for example a message scrawled on page 00075: "If you think the PRINCIPIA is just a ha-ha, then go read it again."Notable symbols in the book include the Apple of Discord, the pentagon, and the "Sacred Chao", which resembles the Taijitu of Taoism, but the two principles depicted are "Hodge" and "Podge" rather than yin and yang, and they are represented by the apple and the pentagon, and not by dots. Saints identified include Emperor Norton, Yossarian, Don Quixote, and Bokonon. The Principia also introduces the mysterious word "fnord", later popularized in The Illuminatus!
To Serve Man
To Serve Man is a story that brings to bare key issues in society that rarely get mentioned or just get shied away from. It tells the story of Nicodemus who had just been released from prison after serving time for a crime, he didn't commit regardless; he stays committed to getting his life together despite the obstacles his situation places on him and fighting his vices. This is a true tale of love, lust, hardship, women, society, parenting, and sexuality amongst other things.To Serve Man confronts American's issues head on and not in a politically correct way. To Serve Man blends together thousands of open, honest conversations and perspectives. It is more than a story it is quintessential guidebook, a must have not just for men and women, but for society. To Serve Man is a way forward.
Laughing Through Life
This hilarious book invites you to sit down and share dinner with the Morans, a family of ten children, and after dinner to share in the family's pranks and crises. You will walk the streets of Carmel, Indiana, a quiet, small town and will see its shops and meet its neighborly people. Along the way, you will learn what it was like growing up in a large family in a small town during the 1950's and 1960's. Whimsical-at times knee-slapping-tales guide you through childhood, the teen years, early adulthood, and beyond. You get a peek at family dynamics and the struggles of an insecure boy's first encounters with romance. You also learn what it was like to be a journalist, a government economist, a parent, and a golf fanatic. The stories are warm, touching, and always funny. The people you meet, mostly based on the author's siblings, are friendly and fun-loving. The situations, based on real events and family lore, will keep you laughing.
HOGWASH de GUANO
Poetry often irreverent, often humorous. Mostly 'underground' in nature. Bold words for a good read. Aimed at a mature audience.
Dad Jokes
Q: Why is that baby still in diapers? A: I'll give you two reasons: number one and number two. Congrats, Dad! Someone in your life thinks you're hilarious. Or corny. Or hilariously corny. No matter what the occasion, dad jokes are always a terribly good idea. Take a load off, pester your people, and test the eye-rolling patience of your children, who will love to hate your new arsenal of 400+ cringe-worthy crack-ups. Jam packed with jokes. (Hold the jam). Hundreds of bad = good dad jokes to test around the house, at the office, and out in the world. Jokes for all! Classically corny puns plus one-liners and Q&As built for dads of all ages and stages. For you, Pop. A family-friendly gift to make any dad's day.
The Official Poopie List
The Official Poopie List is potty humor at its best and worst. To the superficial observer, this book may appear as literal madness, but in truth, it is something we all experience and relate to. There's an underlined allegory hidden in plain sight, a metaphor of sorts that one must unveil to disclose one's truths. If humor is truly the best medicine and laughter can trigger a physical and emotional change in the body, then you'll never be the same after reading this book. You'll begin seeing the world in an unusual way after this book leaves you rolling on the floor chuckling to your heart's content. Be prepared, and watch out. You don't want to have a surprise poopie. #TheOfficialPoopieListCheck Out Some of Our Reviews "This book about number two is number one in my heart." - Big Deuce"The Poopie Book had me questioning everything as I find myself sitting on the throne farting, subconsciously yelling back at my blowhole, 'Don't talk back to me.'" - Seymour Butts"'New York Swines' best-selling author drops another splash hit." - Holden F. Art"If the Illuminati ever had a recruitment book this would be it." - Mud E. Tushie"A little corny, but I like it." - Diane Rhea"Can't wait for my next prairie dogging grumpy to read some more." - Corn Ho"A little gem about poo that's amusing, funny, and refreshing read as I sit on the can." - Florence Brown "It's the Sh*t!" - Fanny May"It had me rolling. LMAO! Laughing my a*s off from the first page to the last." - John
The Rock in the Pavilion
Youth is not wasted on the young so long as we have warm-hearted memoirs like this one. You may or may not have ridden horses, run free on unsupervised summers, or sang inappropriate campfire songs, but the universality of these tales of freedom on the cusp between childhood and teenhood will resonate and recall your own joyful tales. This book is a really nice place to go, and you're invited.
These Stories Are True... I Shit You Not
"Cathy Berra's online dating stories are too good to be true - and that's the fun of this great, page-turning romp."- Laurie Graff, author, You Have to Kiss a Lot of Frogs Online dating is daunting at any stage of life, and the escapades seem to never end! Join Catherine as she bravely navigates her way a through a search for modern-day love. Come along on a journey that will take you through stories of ridiculousness, confusion, bewilderment, and hilarity! Relish in Catherine's initial optimistic attitude and venture alongside as she describes some of the most preposterous dates you could imagine. Laugh out loud at her expense as she describes over ten years of uproarious encounters, experiences, and unbelievably comical misadventures that leave her dumbfounded. Peek around the corner of disbelief as she describes her giggle-inducing quest for that one true connection. With a sense of humor and an eventual understanding that we humans are all quite muddled, lovely, messy, confused, and imperfect, these stories are for anyone who has ever attempted to venture out into the zany world of online dating.
Ordinary People, Extraordinary Burritos
This is the second book by musician and artist Naomi Elizabeth. A series of colorful vignettes and intrusive musings which is now out there in the public world, and it's too late for her to take it back.
The Little Book of Country
Everything you wanted to know about country, from the men and women who put the music on the map, to the genres, guitars and history, to the greatest hits of all time. From the early beginnings of bluegrass, cowboys and Aussie bush balladeers through to modern stars like Shania Twain and Keith Urban, this little book covers key people, music styles and moments in country history. Enjoy folky wisdom from those who have written so movingly about heartbreak and hard times. Discover who plays a Gibson Les Paul and who prefers a Fender Telecaster. Learn the difference between Nashville sound and Bakersfield. So put on your Stetson, step into the line dance, and embrace your inner country-loving cowboy. Yee haw.
The Little Book of Hot Sauce
A connoisseur's guide to the best hot sauces around the world, from Tabasco and Frank's RedHot to Middle Eastern harissa, Asian sriracha, Portuguese peri peri, and more. Discover the history, folklore, and trivia behind the most popular brands of the spicy stuff, as well as special ingredients, types of chilies, and heat levels. Learn how to make homemade condiments that are truly your own and ways to fire up your food and tastebuds with over 25 recipes. Whether you like your sauce sweet, smoky, herby, spicy, or off-your-head hot, this little book is a treat for every chili-lover
Omfg, Bees!
Guess what: Bees are incredible. If you don't think so, you're wrong; but you're also in luck! Extreme bee enthusiast and bestselling author Matt Kracht is here to set the record straight with this helpful guidebook to all things bees. Are you ready for the ultimate bee book? With lighthearted watercolor and ink drawings, humorous quips, lists, and musings, OMFG, BEES! will show you just how important these esteemed bee-list celebrities really are. (Hint: We can't live without them.) Delving into various bee topics, from distinguishing between bees and not bees (very crucial), to exploring the absolute wonder that is bee behavior (they do a coded dance directing their bee friends to food, for crying out loud!), to divulging the mind-blowing bee-magic behind honey making (within some extremely intricate and precisely constructed hexagonal honeycomb, no big deal), and more, Kracht's ode to bees paints a charming and enthusiastic picture of our favorite pollinators. Bee-autiful full-color illustrations fill these pages that playfully and earnestly examine different kinds of bees, from the honeybee to the teddy bear bee, providing unbelievably cool facts about bees and reasons why they deserve a lot more credit as well as our appreciation and advocacy. Because omfg, BEES!! BESTSELLING AUTHOR: Matt Kracht is the author of the bestselling Field Guide to Dumb Birds series: The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of North America, The Field Guide to Dumb Birds of the Whole Stupid World, and The Big Dumb Bird Journal. Now, Kracht offers something special for the more insect-inclined audience with OMFG, BEES!, an enthusiastic celebration in the same vein as Dumb Birds, with a little less fowl language and a bit more earnestness. A FRESH TAKE FOR BEE LOVERS: Most books on bees are serious in tone and highly academic. OMFG, BEES! is the first of its kind: a celebratory, funny, and lighthearted illustrated compendium honoring the little guys that preserve humanity as we know it! A HIGHLY GIFTABLE, QUALITY BOOK: This 5 x 7 inch, 4-color, compact book is packed with both information and humor, making it the perfect gift for novice bee enthusiasts to full-on bee experts. BEES ARE IMPORTANT, FOR GOOD REASON: Without bees, Earth wouldn't be the same! We need bees. With an active Save the Bees movement erupting in the last few years, people are adamant about bee justice. According to Greenpeace, bees are responsible for one in every three bites of food humans consume--spreading this awareness and knowledge is ample reason to celebrate them! Perfect for: An informative and insanely fun option for anyone seeking books about bees for adults A great resource for general bee enthusiasts, Save the Bees advocates, environmentalists, and beekeepers Fans of animal humor books and nature shows Followers of #BeeTok and popular bee Instagram accounts A buzz-worthy gift for students, aspiring entomologists, gardeners, urban farmers, hikers, and all who want to learn about bees without the academic feel Pairing with honey-related gifts for sweet birthday, anniversary, holiday, housewarming, or hostess gift giving
Copper Capers
Copper Capers is a humorous account of the experiences, arrests, and the workings of a police department. You can't make this stuff up! Each short story chapter is an incident that becomes an antidote to what would have been a very dull and sometimes dangerous shift. Funny things are said and done by people being chased and caught by the police. For example, the man who adamantly declared, "I'm not taking the Polygram test!" or the woman who stated that she was a hologram are real experiences. This book was meant to invoke a chuckle from those who can relate to some of the stories. But it also provides a look behind the curtain of how police sustain their sanity under immense pressure.
To Travel Lite, Part 1.5
To Travel Lite, Part 1.5: The Day Two Canines Informally Confessed, is at best a mirror and a heart warmer.We train our house pets to be obedient and follow set rules based on our values, personalities; and lifestyles. We tend to set very high expectations for these beautiful... animals. Yet oftentimes, it's the human-- that seemingly has forgotten its own moral and TRUE nature-- not the pet! Therefore in good conscious we must ask ourselves-- are we really deserving of such respect, obedience, and loyalty-- or is it merely a status symbol, a followed trend, or an emotional impulse when deciding to bring one home? Because relative to any valued friendship... integrity, trust, communication; and reliability are the core elements that will help this new guest and possibly a new family member to maintain- even thrive-- and warm your heart as only true love can do.
Blissful Vibes
Across the decades, PJ Karr realized that her nonfiction stories and photography created laugh-aerobic workouts and an illustrious time to chill. Shared laughter and the bliss were amazing freebies. They resonated as a wanton and valued reprieve. Her classes and storytelling venues reaffirmed that we adults craved the playtime, humorous antics, and fantastic bellyaches as much as young children. Our mindfulness and laughter missions to defuse a concoction of stressors began to remain at the forefront of our stellar days, weeks, and months. Our rejuvenating spirit and healthier physical bodies were purged of the bothersome cortisol. Feel-good dopamine boosts became our natural endorphin highs. Our bona fide foreshadowing of blissful vibrations and superior karma became a welcome intermission. Our non-toxic and restorative smiles, vigorous chuckles, and sublime pleasures finally arrived. Blissful Vibes Our Euphoric Moments of Laughter reveal the purposeful choice to pursue a treasure trove of laughs and valued playtime throughout our life span.
Our Town Oak Park
Walk with me - to the heart of Oak Park, Illinois, a community like no other, yet like all others, where the unique meets the universal. Welcome to our town, a dynamic, ever-evolving entity. The unifying thread is community - discovering it in the day-to-day, the face-to-face, the moments of beauty, the longing to be better than we were, striving to be better than we are, and, as Thornton Wilder wrote in his play, Our Town, prizing the smallest details and events of daily life. Our Town Oak Park aims for that same "rainbow's end" capturing the experience of being alive - in one middle-sized, middle-class, Midwest town at the beginning of the 21st century. True community is more than individuals living next to one another. It is the alchemy that takes place when we interact and become better individuals for doing so. Oak Park is an ongoing experiment to see if a mere collection of individuals can be diverse yet whole, to the benefit of everyone. And if one community can accomplish this, then all can. "We" are not some static set piece, some staged play, some museum diorama. You and I are part of a greater whole yet to come. We're not there yet, but we're getting there, moment by moment. My hope is that you'll find many such moments in this book. This has been both a personal and collective journey. Oak Park has worked hard over the past 70 years to foster community. Not some blissful utopia. Moving toward true community is hard work, but worth the struggle. We're pointing the way because we need as many inclusive, equity-aspiring, ever-evolving, good-governing, welcoming communities as possible. My walk has lasted 32 years. Returning to Oak Park, covering the town for the local newspaper, I got to know people I probably never would have met otherwise. Everyone, I soon learned, has a story and everyone's story is worth telling. Cumulatively, those stories tell who we are - in our living, loving, and dying. And ever so slowly, I discovered a place of deep belonging. I found my way back home.
Haywire
'Our greatest living satirist' Sunday Times 'The most screamingly funny living writer' Mail on Sunday From the bestselling and award-winning author of Ma'am Darling and One Two Three Four, a selection of Craig Brown's finest writing collected together for the first time. Haywire presents a survival guide to the 21st century. The acclaimed biographer of Princess Margaret and The Beatles considers such diverse topics as gloves, outer space, the Marx Brothers, Richard Dawkins, Hitler's hair, John Stonehouse, Katie Price, tongue-twisters, Bruce Springsteen, Harry and Meghan, Stanley Spencer, Brian Epstein, Downton Abbey, Sigmund Freud and Karl Lagerfeld's cat.With the full battery of the humourist's armoury - clerihews, tongue twisters, whimsy, parody, farce, satire, social observation, nonsense - Brown skewers the fads and delusions of the contemporary world.
Father Jim
Story of a Catholic Priest working in a fictitious parish and having to deal with sick and dying parishioners and his own origins.
I Lost Everything in the Post-Natal Depression
A collection of mordantly hilarious and sharply-observed stories on motherhood from the bestselling author of Family--The Ties That Bind . . . And Gag! Erma Bombeck has learned a few things about children and family over the years--and in a way that is uniquely and wonderfully her own, she shares everything she knows with her readers. Whether it's cleaning up after the kids and him, or expendable mothers-in-law, Erma Bombeck gets to the heart of the matter and makes us laugh through our tears. Praise for I Lost Everything in the Post-Natal Depression "A truly wise and funny woman; a laugh-till-you-cry book."--Library Journal "The smiles never stop until the last chapter ends with a poignant insight into growing up and being a parent."--The Abilene Reporter-News
Letters From a Rotten Log
Cindi Camponotus is a particularly astute carpenter ant who lives in a rotten log with her 200,000 sisters. Her reports range widely from pandemics and treason to White House spies and the WEE-TOO movement. She reports on politics and the conspiracy to end humanity. Cindi's forte is the creation of inter-specific treaties that allow her tribe to escape being eaten. Her characters are true to their scientific names. Any correspondence between her reports and the antics of humans is in the mind of the reader, much like satire.
The Fantastic Book of Teacher Jokes
Teachers are hard-working, resilient, and underappreciated.They possess a great sense of humour, a never-ending well ofpatience, and remember self-soothing mantras they can say under theirbreath to keep calm. Teachers certainly deserve a lotof credit and, let's face it, it's because they are underpaid... but ifthey weren't, then perhaps maths teachers could eat somethingother than cos-law. This book will definitely remind you of the good, great, and awfulteachers, as well as some crazy students. Now, a word of caution must be had, some jokes are innocent, and some arerude & lewd, but none are meant to offend. As studies have shown, the darker your sense of humour, the more intelligent you may be. With that being said, put your feet up, and, unlike a cross-eyed teacher who couldn't control their pupils, you will actually be able to see and enjoy this book. "It is the supreme art of the teacher to awaken joy in creativeexpression and knowledge" - Albert Einstein
Lockdown Limericks 4 - Staying Alive with BA.5
Continuing on from Lockdown Limericks 3, Highs and Lows and Lateral Flows, these daily verses follow our pandemic in the UK from 17th March 2022 to 2nd October 2022 as two further waves of the Covid Omicron variants, BA.2 and BA.5 sweep over a country in considerable constitutional turmoil. From confidence votes to tax cuts, Monarchy, monkeypox and Mick Jagger, Nazanin, non-doms and night sweats, Lionesses and living with Covid, Lockdown Limericks 4, the last in the series, chronicles in light-hearted verse, our experiences over this extraordinary period. This final book is dedicated to the author's mother, Eileen Baldock. The author's royalties will be used to support research into kidney disease.
Conversations from a Long Marriage
Joanna and Roger have been married for over forty years. Children of the Sixties, they're still free spirits, drawn together by their passion for music - and each other. Conversations from a Long Marriage is exactly that: following conversations that take them from the local caf矇, to their kitchen table, taking in her resentment of new glasses - a symbol of ageing - and fury at being lectured by the dental hygienist. He has a dodgy knee and is on statins, and when they discuss the marriage break-up of their closest friends, Sally and Peter, there's jealousy and talk of affairs. She suggests there are advantages to single beds, separate holidays and wants to go clubbing in Ibiza for her imminent 'big' birthday. Witty, big-hearted and a whole lot of fun, Conversations from a Long Marriage will resonate with couples of any age - but especially those who are still dancing in the kitchen, singing in the car and trying to keep the passion alive.
Chicago Irish Mythology
Book Description: The latest stories from celebrated writer Mike "Houli" Houlihan with brand new stories from The Irish Echo, Irish American News, and mikehoulihan.com
9249 *
Amy Winston, age 75, decides to liberate her childhood friend Clara, who has Alzheimer's Disease, from the Daffodil ward of Spring Garden Manor. When Amy's plan for her friend somehow miraculously succeeds, the two old friends take off for the south with great and hopeful expectations of a better life once Clara is freed from her medicated stupor. Along the way Amy finds out how difficult it is to care for her friend; but when Clara finally remembers Amy's name for the first time in ages, it all seems worthwhile. Although there are plenty of laughs in this book, in truth there is nothing funny about this devastating disease; but, in the midst of the heartbreak, there is a message of hope and enduring love encompassed in these pages. The indomitable spirit of these two lively geriatric gypsies is a salve for the soul and a bouquet for the heart. 9249* is a tribute to the bonds of friendship that stand the tests of time throughout the ages, pages, and stages of life. It will pull at your heartstrings, tug at your smile, and wet your eyes with joy and sorrow.
America Open your Gift
This book is about 4 golden years of Christianity in America and the opportunity of 119 million America Citizens to become a Millionaire and 2017 is the year of Jubilee for Israel and all-American debt be cancelled at the same time as America defense Israel. This book is touching Heaven and changing earth and this is a must book to every single American to have it or you will miss the hugest Blessing are ready to manifest to every believer. Amen and God Bless you and God bless America the land of hope and the land of opportunity and home for the braves.
