Not That It Matters
Not that it matters presents a series of light essays that reveal gentle humor and sharp insight into ordinary life. Through reflections on the peculiar joys of golf, the subtle rituals of writing, and the quiet mysteries of suburban streets, the book offers a playful but meaningful engagement with the world. Milne begins with a meditation on the supposed inspiration drawn from a new pen nib, using this seemingly trivial moment to explore the whimsical challenges writers face in summoning creativity. Rather than offering grand philosophical declarations, Milne moves with ease through subjects like Acacia Road, a symbol of quiet domestic life, to ruminations on personal libraries, where unread books and old favorites coexist in an almost comical hierarchy. The essays maintain a tone of gentle irony while also revealing the author s affection for the details of daily existence. Beneath the surface of his wit lies a sincere curiosity about how people live, work, and find joy in small things. The charm of the writing lies in its ability to elevate the mundane into something quietly resonant and enduring.
Drunk on Eggnog
Drunk on Eggnog: A Dysfunctional Family Christmas Survival Guide is thetongue-in-cheek handbook you didn't know you needed.Equal parts comedy Christmas memoir and holiday survival guide, it armsyou with laugh-out-loud stories, sharp one-liners, and research-backed holidaysurvival tips for enduring even the messiest gatherings.Perfect for fans of family drama books and anyone craving a funny holidayfamily drama book, this is a Christmas survival guide for adults who've facedawkward in-laws, overcooked turkeys, political debates at the dinner table, orthe ultimate test - Christmas parenting survival.More than just jokes, this book is a comforting reminder that chaos is normal, your family isn't uniquely broken, and humor is the best gift of all. Whether youbuy it for yourself or slip it into someone's stocking, it's destined to become theholiday survival guide you'll reach for year after year.
Jane Said It Best
'What are young men to rocks and mountains?', wondered Elizabeth Bennet in Pride and Prejudice - and more than 200 years later, many of us are still asking ourselves the same thing! Little wonder, then, that Jane Austen's words are some of the most enduring, as her wit and wisdom extended far beyond her lifetime. Accompanied by beautiful illustrations that portray Austen's characters and her world at its most relatable, Jane Said It Best is a celebration of over 70 of her astute observations that still ring true to this day. In time for the 250th anniversary of her birth, this book brings to life quotes from all of Austen's beloved novels, as well as her private writings. The perfect gift for any Janeite, or anyone in need of some wise words to live by.
Adapt, Panic, or Profit? Hilariously Stressful Quizzes About the Future
Surviving AI, broken systems, and climate chaos is hard enough-now HR is involved.This darkly funny collection of survival quizzes is here to diagnose your most questionable coping mechanisms.Can you outsmart the algorithm, survive the demon uprising, and still make it to Casual Friday?From glitching smart fridges and sentient toasters to ancient prophecies and corporate sword policies, Adapt, Panic, or Profit? blends high-stakes chaos with laugh-out-loud absurdity.Take the quiz and find out: - Are you quietly unraveling-or just updating your settings again? - Will your AI fridge stage a coup before the oceans rise? - Can you out-evolve the flaming penguins?This premium satirical quiz book offers absurd diagnostics for the emotionally literate, the mythically unwell, the burnout-optimized, and the romantically doomed.It won't fix the world-but it might explain why you're still refreshing your inbox as the servers burn.Your odds of survival are statistically irrelevant.But at least the Wi-Fi still works.And you're not alone in this glitch.
On the Ball
Whether you're a FOOTBALL fan, a PICKLEBALL pro, a TENNIS aficionado, or a CRICKET enthusiast, you'll love this fascinating collection of *over 200* sports facts. Did you know... A standard basketball has about 4,118 "pebbles" on its outer surface? All Major League Baseball umpires must wear black underwear in case their pants split? The longest ever pickleball rally consisted of 10,532 consecutive shots and lasted over 2 hours? Like the sound of these facts and want to know more? Then On the Ball is essential reading. Featuring obscure, unbelievable, intriguing, and engaging facts about some of the world's most popular ball sports, discover more than 200 fascinating nuggets of information on the sports, the balls, the players, the history, and more. Find out why the number of dimples on a golf ball can make you a better player, what the fastest recorded serve is in a tennis match, and who is the world's highest-earning ball player. All this makes this miscellany a must-have for any sports trivia fans.
White Slaves; or, the Oppression of the Worthy Poor
Discover the powerful narrative of "White Slaves; or, the Oppression of the Worthy Poor," a poignant exploration of historical injustices that resonates today. This compelling 19th-century literature delves into the harsh realities of economic disparity, class struggle, and the exploitation of the vulnerable. Through vivid storytelling, the author sheds light on the plight of the oppressed, making a profound social commentary that advocates for humanitarian issues and social reform. After decades of being out of print, Alpha Editions proudly presents this restored edition, ensuring that this cultural treasure is preserved for today s and future generations. This is not merely a reprint; it's a collector s item that invites both casual readers and classic literature enthusiasts to engage with a vital piece of our shared history. As you immerse yourself in this gripping tale, you will find echoes of the past that challenge us to reflect on current societal issues. "White Slaves" is more than just a book; it s a call to action against poverty and exploitation, a testament to human rights advocacy that remains relevant in our modern world. Don t miss the chance to own this essential work that captures the spirit of struggle and resilience. Join the movement to honor the worthy poor and elevate their voices through literature that inspires change.
Mindful Meowments
Follow the WISDOM of cats and start LIVING IN THE MOMENT with this tongue-in-cheek collection of EXPERT advice on MINDFULNESS--the feline way--and CUTE pictures to color in. Cats live a stressful life--they're expected to operate on just 16 hours of sleep a day and have to cope with the evil tabby next door, unexpected trips to the vet, and the occasional stubborn hairball. Thankfully, they've mastered the art of mindfulness, focusing on the here and now. Be inspired by the humorous cat-themed advice for living your life more mindfully. "Take time to enjoy the simpler things in life and avoid unnecessary distractions. Who needs pomp and circumstance when you have a cardboard box?" The book is also crammed with charming illustrations of kitties for you to color in. Featuring everything from pictures of sweet moggies chasing feathers to mischievous fluffy cats encouraging you to overcome your fears (facing the scary vacuum), Mindfulness for Cats is sure to delight cat lovers everywhere.
Fancies I Dare Not Speak
Sir Robert Menzies was arguably Australia's greatest political orator, but how did he develop his magnificent way with words?The language of the 'Forgotten People' has etched itself permanently in the Australian political lexicon, but few realise that Menzies learned to write speeches in part by writing verse. This new collection brings to light Menzies's hidden artistry, from childhood rhymes about football to witty parodies of his political rivals. In doing so, it offers a new window into the great man, and the early twentieth century Australia in which he thrived.'Fancies I Dare Not Speak: The Hidden Verse of R. G. Menzies' features prose written by Robert Menzies, sourced from the Menzies Collection at the University of Melbourne, the Menzies Papers in the National Library of Australia, private family papers, and other published materials. Some poems are short and heartfelt, for friends and family. Others are long, brimming with rhythmic commentary to be read aloud to an attentive audience. They all offer a rare glimpse into a moment in time otherwise lost, where Menzies's thoughts were so overpowering, they could only be expressed through the art of poetry.This collection was edited by Georgina Downer, William Cook, and Victoria Hronas with an introduction by Dr Damien Freeman.This book was previously published as Collected Poems and Other Writings by R. G. Menzies.
Farm Yoga 2026 12 X 12 Wall Calendar
BARNYARD BALANCE - Delight in the whimsy of barnyard animals striking their best yoga poses in this laugh-out-loud calendar that's equal parts zen and zany. Perfect for yoga lovers, animal fans, or anyone who enjoys a daily dose of silly serenity.
Do or Donut 2026 12 X 12 Wall Calendar
DONUT STOP BELIEVIN' - Whether it's cake or glazed, mochi or fritter, the 2026 Do or Donut 12" x 12" Wall Calendar is the perfect way to add sugar nuggets of knowledge and sprinkles of joy to your year. From "Donut worry, be happy!" to "Life is short, eat the donut." this calendar is filled with wisdom as sweet as Bavarian cream and inspired by nature's perfect food.
Totally 90s 2026 12 X 12 Wall Calendar
RETRO REWIND - The Totally 90's 2026 calendar is a nostalgic blast from the past, packed with throwback images and relatable captions that'll have you laughing and reminiscing all year long. From cassette tapes to jelly sandals, relive the quirky charm of your favorite decade.
Demotivationals 2026 12 X 12 Wall Calendar
WILDLY HILARIOUS - This 2026 wall calendar puts a comical twist on classic motivational posters, featuring animals paired with sarcastic captions that poke fun at ambition, patience, and success. Each month delivers a dose of dry humor to keep your spirits lifted and your expectations in check.
Doug the Pug 2026 6.5 X 8.5 Engagement Calendar
DOUG THE PUG - Get to know the "King of Pop Culture" with a massive following of 18 million on social media and billions of video views. Doug's camera-friendly charm shines just as bright in this spiral-bound softcover weekly planner.
Crusoe the Celebrity Dachshund 2026 6.5 X 8.5 Engagement Calendar
CRUSOE'S CHRONICLES - With appearances on Ellen, Good Morning America, and more, Crusoe's over 50M viral video views and nearly 3M social media followers make him the undisputed canine king of pop culture. Follow in Crusoe's pawprints and capture your own adventures with this spiral-bound softcover weekly planner.
The Argyle Sweater 2026 Day-To-Day Calendar
Step into the fantastical realm of Scott Hillburn's Argyle Sweater where animals talk, politicians are honest, and ordinary moments take on delightfully bizarre twists. Each page of this The Argyle Sweater 2026 Day-to-Day Calendar reimagines pop culture, personal connections, and historical events with witty, pun-packed comedy, sure to inspire thought and provoke amusement all year long. With its unique blend of absurdity, cleverness, and imaginative humor, this desktop calendar promises a daily dose of surreal, slow-burn laughter. Features include: No single-use plastic Page size: 5.354" x 4.488" Recyclable chipboard easel backer for desk or tabletop display Printed on FSC(R) certified paper with soy-based ink Full-color tear-off pages Back of pages contain Daily Extra content such as puzzles, jokes, quotations, and trivia Day/Date reference on each page Combined weekend pages Official major world holidays and observances Each page features a different, humorous The Argyle Sweater comic
Pearls Before Swine 2026 Day-To-Day Calendar
According to the Pearls Before Swine 2026 Day-to-Day Calendar, you're going to have a great year or your money back! (. . . Don't hold us to that.) With the trademark twisted humor and outlandish puns that have made Pearls Before Swine one of the funniest comic strips being published today, each page of this daily calendar features a full-color Pearls Before Swine comic strip to keep you laughing all year. As an added bonus, the back of each page includes Daily Extra! content such as puzzles, jokes, lists, quotes, activities, tips, and trivia. Features include: Page size: 5.354" x 4.488" No single-use plastic Recyclable chipboard easel backer for desk or tabletop display Printed on FSC certified paper with soy-based ink Full-color tear-off pages Includes Daily Extra! Bonus content on the back of each day's page Day/Date reference on each page 365 daily pages Official major world holidays and observances Features a new comic each day
DSM-K for Kepele
DSM-K for Kepele is a witty, one-of-a-kind fusion of psychiatry and Yiddish culture from the mind of Dr. Jolie Pataki, a psychiatrist with over 30 years of experience-and a Jew for more than twice as long. Through the humorous lens of her alter-ego, Dr. Fackacta, she offers a fresh (and hilarious) take on mental health diagnoses, replacing clinical jargon with the most accurately descriptive language ever spoken: Yiddish.With tongue-in-cheek "disorders" like Kvetch Disorder, Plotz Attacks, and Folie-A-Jew, Dr. Pataki pokes fun at the quirks of human nature, psychiatric practice, and cultural traditions alike. Whether you're a mental health professional, a lover of Jewish humor, or just someone who appreciates a good "oy vey," this book delivers insight and laughs in equal measure.Packed with cultural references, clever definitions, and compassionate wit, DSM-K for Kepele is more than a parody-it's a celebration of the richness (and ridiculousness) of human behavior. Read it, share it, and maybe even self-diagnose-at your own risk, of course.
The Love Language of Dogs
This hilarious illustrated book revels in the unusual ways your dog may express their love and affection. You love your furry friend, and they love you too... lots. But has your dog ever gone a bit too far in pursuit of your approval, with well-intentioned behaviour leading to chaos? Brimming with humorous illustrations and witty captions, The Love Language of Dogs is here to help you appreciate your pet pup's desire to impress. Within you will find out: - What happens when your dog decides to make you dinner - What your pooch is trying to achieve by barking over all your guests - Why you should always be suspicious when your pet brings you free things Perfect for dog lovers and owners alike, this book offers insight into the various funny ways your pup may try to show their affection. It's sure to bring a smile to your face as you realize that, even if your dog sometimes takes things too far, you'll always love them!
My Cat's Plans for World Domination
This hilarious illustrated book revels in the ways your cat is taking advantage of your kind and unsuspecting nature. You love your furry friend and, as far as you know, they love you too. But have you ever suspected your feline companion of playing emotional mind games, sneaking around behind your back or being cleverer than they let on? Brimming with humorous illustrations and witty captions, My Cat's Plans for World Domination is here to help you appreciate your cat's crafty side. Within you will find out: - What happens when you leave your phone unattended in the presence of your pampered puss - What your cat is playing at when they refuse to use the cat flap - Why you should never take interior design advice from a pet Perfect for cat lovers and long-suffering owners, this book offers valuable insight into the various clever ways cats exert their dominance over humans. It's sure to bring a smile to your face as you realize that, even if your cat is slightly evil, you'll always love them!
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes 2026 Day-To-Day Calendar
This day-to-day calendar features 1,000 jokes perfect for home or work. Chock-full of family-friendly laughs! This day-to-day calendar offers several jokes per page, from cringe-inducing puns to silly Q&A to corny knock-knock humor. A year's worth of laughs! Features include: No single-use plastic Page size 4.606 x 4.606 Recyclable chipboard easel backer for desk or tabletop display Printed on FSC(R) certified paper with soy-based ink Full-color tear-off pages Back of pages are blank for notes or shopping lists Day/Date reference on each page Combined weekend pages Official major world holidays and observances Silly, pun-derful jokes from the bestselling book series Laugh-Out-Loud-Jokes for Kids by Rob Elliott
Epiphany and the Shopping Trolley
Step into the lives of Catherine Bradshaw and Pauline Zufferey-two ENFP schoolteachers, mothers, and dear friends who somehow always end up back in the classroom, despite their best intentions. With red curls and an Italian nose, Catherine pens the words. Raven-haired and fiercely creative, Pauline brings them to life with art. Between them lies more than a century of life experience, sixty years of wrangling classrooms, and over five decades of parenting.This book is a tapestry of humour, heartache, faith, motherhood, Christmas carparks, rogue shopping trolleys, and sacred moments found in everyday chaos. Through witty monologues and striking illustrations, Catherine and Pauline invite you to laugh, cry, reflect-and perhaps see the miraculous in your own mundane.
The Ultimate Movie Trivia Challenge
Do you eat popcorn with extra butter and a side of obscure film facts?The Ultimate Movie Trivia Challenge is the ultimate test for cinema lovers-a compendium of over 600 multiple-choice questions covering more than a century of movies. Whether you're looking for gifts for movie lovers, movie night gift ideas, or just want to challenge your own knowledge, this book delivers hours of fun.Packed with jaw-dropping facts, behind-the-scenes secrets, and hilarious stories, this trivia book goes beyond the screen to uncover the hidden gems of film history. From cult classics to Hollywood blockbusters, this is more than just a quiz-it's your VIP pass to bragging rights among friends and family.Inside you'll find: Over 600 fun multiple-choice questions, neatly divided into 34 themed chapters.Coverage of 100+ years of cinema, from the 1920s to today's superhero spectacles.Topics ranging from sci-fi, thrillers, and musicals to Oscars, world cinema, and iconic directors.Full answers and explanations after every quiz, so you'll always learn something new.A beautifully organized, illustrated format that makes it a keepsake as well as a game.Whether you're shopping for trivia books for adults, a fun game for the next movie night, or even birthday gifts for boyfriend, girlfriend, or anyone who can't stop quoting movies, this book makes a perfect pick.So grab your popcorn, silence your phones, and prepare to unleash your inner film nerd. From Hitchcock suspense to superhero blockbusters, this trivia-packed challenge will test even the most die-hard fans.Warning: Side effects may include spontaneous quoting, overconfidence at parties, and shouting "I knew that!" way too often.The Ultimate Movie Trivia Challenge-because real movie buffs don't just watch movies, they live them.
Dancing with Chihuahuas
For all of you out there who enjoyed reading my previous book Watching the World, this is what you've been waiting for!Dancing with Chihuahuas is somewhat of a follow-up, packed with plenty more of my anecdotal stories from here, there and everywhere. There's tales garnered from my travels, incidents experience when walking round the supermarket, an insight into a few rather strange job interviews I've had over the years, a tale about staying in a bed and breakfast, and, of course, one of my favourite subjects: the great British public and what they manage to get up to in restaurants! There's even stories of what happened when I was just minding my own business (a rare occasion, I hear you say).For those of you who have not read Watching the World (not that there can be many left who haven't), after you have read this book I can thoroughly recommend giving it a go. It offers a more in-depth look at certain subjects from my own point of view, whereas this book tends to skim the surface of what people really get up to when they think no one is watching. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy this book, and that you get as much pleasure from reading it as I did compiling and writing it. And one last thought for you... If something should happen to you during your day - however trivial - and you thought no one was watching... trust me, they were!
DSM-K for Kepele
DSM-K for Kepele is a witty, one-of-a-kind fusion of psychiatry and Yiddish culture from the mind of Dr. Jolie Pataki, a psychiatrist with over 30 years of experience-and a Jew for more than twice as long. Through the humorous lens of her alter-ego, Dr. Fackacta, she offers a fresh (and hilarious) take on mental health diagnoses, replacing clinical jargon with the most accurately descriptive language ever spoken: Yiddish.With tongue-in-cheek "disorders" like Kvetch Disorder, Plotz Attacks, and Folie-A-Jew, Dr. Pataki pokes fun at the quirks of human nature, psychiatric practice, and cultural traditions alike. Whether you're a mental health professional, a lover of Jewish humor, or just someone who appreciates a good "oy vey," this book delivers insight and laughs in equal measure.Packed with cultural references, clever definitions, and compassionate wit, DSM-K for Kepele is more than a parody-it's a celebration of the richness (and ridiculousness) of human behavior. Read it, share it, and maybe even self-diagnose-at your own risk, of course.
Last Seen Online
A funny workplace mystery about friendship, burnout, and the chaos of modern office life.When a young designer at a Mumbai tech startup is found dead just days before her big promotion, the office reacts the only way it knows how: With awkward condolences, badly timed emojis, and a calendar invite for grief counselling.But one employee isn't ready to move on.Told entirely through office group chats, private messages, and suspiciously timed emails, Last Seen Online is a sharp, satirical murder mystery about how fast we move on-and what gets left unread.Perfect for fans of: Corporate thrillers with humourWitty, fast-paced chat fictionBooks like The Thursday Murder Club, My Dark Vanessa, or The AppealAnyone who's ever wanted to throw their laptop at a Slack notificationSet in the chaos of a modern Indian workplace, this book combines dark humour, emotional depth, and a gripping whodunit that keeps you guessing-until the final reveal hits like a reply-all gone wrong.
Dear Diary
A Ridiculously Relatable Guide for Writers, Grammar Nerds, and Emotionally Unstable Sentences EverywhereAre you overwhelmed by commas? Haunted by em dashes? Having an emotionally complicated relationship with ellipses? Same.This isn't your average grammar guide. It's part style manual, part therapy session, and part chaos-driven love letter to the tiny marks that keep our writing from collapsing into incoherent word soup. Told in diary form from the perspective of a slightly frazzled writer (okay, very frazzled), this book tackles each punctuation mark like the character it truly is-from the emotionally repressed Period to the drama-drenched Em Dash to the Interrobang that demands to know what's going on?!Whether you're a seasoned author, an anxious student, or someone who just wants to understand why a semicolon is judging you, this book is here to help. Or at least keep you laughing while you spiral.Because punctuation can't fix you.But it can absolutely make you feel like you're not alone in the sentence.
Where's my phone?
Darshani is a busy mom, human resources manager, entrepreneur, and nutritionist who's constantly juggling a million things-until she loses her phone. What starts as a simple search for a missing phone turns into a laugh-out-loud yet emotional journey of self-discovery. Between balancing family life and a demanding career, this multitasking mom realizes that sometimes losing your phone (even in the fridge) helps you and what really matters: yourself.Where's my phone? "Finding Life's Treasures in the Chaos" is a hilarious and heartwarming short story collection about a caffeine-fuelled, sleep-deprived mom immersed in the wild ride of parenting, filled with mom-brain moments, unexpected treasures, and ultimately love and laughter. Because in the chaos of motherhood, the things you truly need are rarely what you're looking for.
The Dirty Girl's Guide to Men, Handbags, & the Universe
Men are clueless. This is no surprise to women anywhere. What better way to offer some insight into the minds of women than to give up the Chick Code? Author Michelle Morgan does just that with her humorous debut filled with short stories. Morgan will whip readers into a laughing frenzy as they learn about the opposite sex, how to co-habitate, and of course - the sacred sex towel. A must-read for both men and women!
Where's my phone?
Darshani is a busy mom, human resources manager, entrepreneur, and nutritionist who's constantly juggling a million things-until she loses her phone. What starts as a simple search for a missing phone turns into a laugh-out-loud yet emotional journey of self-discovery. Between balancing family life and a demanding career, this multitasking mom realizes that sometimes losing your phone (even in the fridge) helps you and what really matters: yourself.Where's my phone? "Finding Life's Treasures in the Chaos" is a hilarious and heartwarming short story collection about a caffeine-fuelled, sleep-deprived mom immersed in the wild ride of parenting, filled with mom-brain moments, unexpected treasures, and ultimately love and laughter. Because in the chaos of motherhood, the things you truly need are rarely what you're looking for.
The Wit And Humour Of The Persians
Explore the rich tradition of Persian wit and humor in this delightful collection of anecdotes and stories. "The Wit And Humour Of The Persians" offers a glimpse into the cultural values, social customs, and everyday life of the Persian people through their jokes, puns, and clever retorts. Discover the timeless appeal of these humorous tales, showcasing the unique perspective and enduring spirit of Persian society. A fascinating and entertaining read for anyone interested in Middle Eastern culture and the universal language of laughter.This work has been selected by scholars as being culturally important, and is part of the knowledge base of civilization as we know it. This work was reproduced from the original artifact, and remains as true to the original work as possible. Therefore, you will see the original copyright references, library stamps (as most of these works have been housed in our most important libraries around the world), and other notations in the work.This work is in the public domain in the United States of America, and possibly other nations. Within the United States, you may freely copy and distribute this work, as no entity (individual or corporate) has a copyright on the body of the work.As a reproduction of a historical artifact, this work may contain missing or blurred pages, poor pictures, errant marks, etc. Scholars believe, and we concur, that this work is important enough to be preserved, reproduced, and made generally available to the public. We appreciate your support of the preservation process, and thank you for being an important part of keeping this knowledge alive and relevant.
Primary Sources, Historical Collections
"Ph?"nixiana; or Sketches and Burlesques" is a collection of humorous writings by George Horatio Derby, writing under the pen name John Phoenix. This edition includes a foreword by T.S. Wentworth, adding historical context. The book offers a glimpse into 19th-century American humor, filled with satire and burlesque. Derby's witty observations and comical narratives provide entertaining and insightful commentary on society and culture of his time. Discover the enduring appeal of these literary sketches, showcasing the author's talent for blending wit and social critique.This work has been selected by scholars as being culturally important, and is part of the knowledge base of civilization as we know it. This work was reproduced from the original artifact, and remains as true to the original work as possible. Therefore, you will see the original copyright references, library stamps (as most of these works have been housed in our most important libraries around the world), and other notations in the work.This work is in the public domain in the United States of America, and possibly other nations. Within the United States, you may freely copy and distribute this work, as no entity (individual or corporate) has a copyright on the body of the work.As a reproduction of a historical artifact, this work may contain missing or blurred pages, poor pictures, errant marks, etc. Scholars believe, and we concur, that this work is important enough to be preserved, reproduced, and made generally available to the public. We appreciate your support of the preservation process, and thank you for being an important part of keeping this knowledge alive and relevant.
Corny Animal Jokes With Real Pictures
Pictures of real animals, corny jokes, and good clean humor make CORNEY ANIMAL JOKES WITH REAL PICTURES a book that helps families and friends enjoy time together reading, laughing, and learning. All animal pictures in this book were taken by the author.
Writing (For Beer Money)
"Is this a book of writing advice or a satire of books of writing advice?" 'Frankenstein "I laughed when I should have learned and I learned when I should have laughed!" 'Frankenstein's Monster"If you're sick of books written by cock-sure absolutist industry insiders promising to make you a better writer that never work as advertised (both the books and the cock-sure writers), you'll love this book promising to make you a better writer that doesn't work as advertised (its author hasn't held a job long enough to be an insider of anything)!"'Tarzan "Simply the best book of writing advice ever written!" 'Your Name Here ($50)"Who pays the $50?" 'Alright, $60"I never said 'I can't recommend this book highly enough'. I said 'I can't recommend this book'."'Ebenezer Scrooge "Simply the best book of writing advice I've ever written!" 'Sherlock Holmes"Simply a book of writing advice ever written!" 'Dracula"What is the point of this masturbatory nonsense? Can I say 'masturbatory' in a book blurb?" 'Misty B Torrie "No." 'Dorian Gray"Besides the blurbs where the publisher sleazily begs us for money (or offers to pay us money?) and the masturbation joke, the quoted are all just characters from public domain movies and books..."'Night of the Living Dead"Look, worst case scenario, this book's cheap." 'Alright, $8
or words to that effect
The latest collection by master prose poet Brad Rose.
A Roundup of Cowboy Humor
For nearly a century, writers have been inspired by the rich, ironic, insightful humour of the West. Ted Stone has lassoed an hilarious sampling of the best of these stories and poems in A Roundup of Cowboy Humour, a collection that reverberates with the comic spirit of old-time stories told beside a roundup campfire.
They called me God
A comical story of a man called God who stranded five million years ago on our Earth. His life became an endless task of tweaking the genomes of great apes to create a race in his image. Exhausted in our Stone-Age, using cryo-sleep to refresh, he overslept and woke up recently in Wiltshire England to a new world. An epic tale told in 30000 words and 600 images.5-star review by author Jamie Michele.They Called Me God is a book that I went into having no idea what it would be and walked away with a massive smile on my face.The classic comic book style is a brilliant format. The artwork is bold, and the way Simonar creates an entire arc and storyline in this media style is a testament to his immense skill as a writer and, more importantly, a true creative. There is intelligent wit and satire, but there is also a real, fundamental basis of influence and survival, and the collision of old knowledge, new customs, and tolerance for both. God is, as one would expect, subject to exploitation, even indirectly. The highlight for me is the invocation of Emma Stone. Overall, this is an original and thoughtful work of art that absolutely promises readers a distinctive reading and visual experience, and I would give it a whole bucket of stars if I could. Very highly recommended.
The Cruise Of The Kawa;
Embark on a whimsical voyage with George S. Chappell's "The Cruise Of The Kawa," a delightful parody of travelogues and adventure narratives. Published in 1921, this humorous account follows the misadventures and comical observations of travelers aboard the Kawa, lampooning the conventions of travel writing with wit and charm. Chappell's satirical take on exotic locales and tourist experiences provides a lighthearted escape, capturing the spirit of early 20th-century humor. "The Cruise Of The Kawa" is a timeless treasure for those who appreciate clever wordplay and a good-natured ribbing of the travel genre. Experience the laughter and absurdity that made this book a beloved classic.This work has been selected by scholars as being culturally important, and is part of the knowledge base of civilization as we know it. This work was reproduced from the original artifact, and remains as true to the original work as possible. Therefore, you will see the original copyright references, library stamps (as most of these works have been housed in our most important libraries around the world), and other notations in the work.This work is in the public domain in the United States of America, and possibly other nations. Within the United States, you may freely copy and distribute this work, as no entity (individual or corporate) has a copyright on the body of the work.As a reproduction of a historical artifact, this work may contain missing or blurred pages, poor pictures, errant marks, etc. Scholars believe, and we concur, that this work is important enough to be preserved, reproduced, and made generally available to the public. We appreciate your support of the preservation process, and thank you for being an important part of keeping this knowledge alive and relevant.
The Cruise Of The Kawa;
Embark on a whimsical voyage with George S. Chappell's "The Cruise Of The Kawa," a delightful parody of travelogues and adventure narratives. Published in 1921, this humorous account follows the misadventures and comical observations of travelers aboard the Kawa, lampooning the conventions of travel writing with wit and charm. Chappell's satirical take on exotic locales and tourist experiences provides a lighthearted escape, capturing the spirit of early 20th-century humor. "The Cruise Of The Kawa" is a timeless treasure for those who appreciate clever wordplay and a good-natured ribbing of the travel genre. Experience the laughter and absurdity that made this book a beloved classic.This work has been selected by scholars as being culturally important, and is part of the knowledge base of civilization as we know it. This work was reproduced from the original artifact, and remains as true to the original work as possible. Therefore, you will see the original copyright references, library stamps (as most of these works have been housed in our most important libraries around the world), and other notations in the work.This work is in the public domain in the United States of America, and possibly other nations. Within the United States, you may freely copy and distribute this work, as no entity (individual or corporate) has a copyright on the body of the work.As a reproduction of a historical artifact, this work may contain missing or blurred pages, poor pictures, errant marks, etc. Scholars believe, and we concur, that this work is important enough to be preserved, reproduced, and made generally available to the public. We appreciate your support of the preservation process, and thank you for being an important part of keeping this knowledge alive and relevant.
Writing (For Beer Money)
"Is this a book of writing advice or a satire of books of writing advice?"'Frankenstein"I laughed when I should have learned and I learned when I should have laughed!"'Frankenstein's Monster"If you're sick of books written by cock-sure absolutist industry insiders promising to make you a better writer that never work as advertised (both the books and the cock-sure writers), you'll love this book promising to make you a better writer that doesn't work as advertised (its author hasn't held a job long enough to be an insider of anything)!"'Tarzan"Simply the best book of writing advice ever written!"'Your Name Here ($50)"Who pays the $50?"'Alright, $60"I never said 'I can't recommend this book highly enough'. I said 'I can't recommend this book'."'Ebenezer Scrooge"Simply the best book of writing advice I've ever written!"'Sherlock Holmes"Simply a book of writing advice ever written!"'Dracula"What is the point of this masturbatory nonsense? Can I say 'masturbatory' in a book blurb?"'Misty B Torrie"No."'Dorian Gray"Besides the blurbs where the publisher sleazily begs us for money (or offers to pay us money?) and the masturbation joke, the quoted are all just characters from public domain movies and books..."'Night of the Living Dead"Look, worst case scenario, this book's cheap."'Alright, $8
The Sayings Of Uncle Rufus
"The Sayings Of Uncle Rufus" presents a humorous and satirical look at the world of Wall Street speculation. Through witty anecdotes and quotable advice attributed to the fictional Uncle Rufus, the anonymous author delivers a lighthearted critique of business practices and investment strategies. With a subtitle that hints at dreaming of being William H. Vanderbilt, virtuous advice to ladies contemplating speculation, and a great metropolitan mammary pipe line, this collection offers a glimpse into a bygone era's perspective on finance, cleverly disguised as amusing entertainment.This work has been selected by scholars as being culturally important, and is part of the knowledge base of civilization as we know it. This work was reproduced from the original artifact, and remains as true to the original work as possible. Therefore, you will see the original copyright references, library stamps (as most of these works have been housed in our most important libraries around the world), and other notations in the work.This work is in the public domain in the United States of America, and possibly other nations. Within the United States, you may freely copy and distribute this work, as no entity (individual or corporate) has a copyright on the body of the work.As a reproduction of a historical artifact, this work may contain missing or blurred pages, poor pictures, errant marks, etc. Scholars believe, and we concur, that this work is important enough to be preserved, reproduced, and made generally available to the public. We appreciate your support of the preservation process, and thank you for being an important part of keeping this knowledge alive and relevant.
The Impawsibly Good Book of Cat Jokes
A purrfectly compiled book of cat jokes featuring the absolute best of the worst groan-worthy feline funnies, with adorable illustrations littered throughout. This book isn't kitten around! From the author of the bestselling Essential Compendium of Dad Jokes, this collection of 165 hissterical jokes will provide endless silliness and just-one-more amewsment for any cat lover. Whether you simply need a laugh or want to fill an awkward pawse in conversation, turn the pages of The Impawsibly Good Book of Cat Jokes to find shareable puns and one-liners surrounded by bright, playful artwork that captures just the right cattitude. When it comes to feline-themed fun, this catpendium of comedy has got it all, fur real. A PAWSOME GIFT FOR CAT LOVERS: Whether you love cats or are looking for a present for someone who does, this book is perfect for anyone who just can't get enough of their feline friends. 100+ JOKES: This joke book is jam-packed with painfully punny entries, including such gems as: What party game do kittens love to play? Mewsical chairs. Have you heard about the cat who had his membership revoked? He had forgotten to pay his annual fleas. Why did the cat wear a tuxedo? He was feline fancy! DAD JOKES WITH A TWIST: No matter how cringe-worthy they are, dad jokes will always have a special place in the joke arsenal. Classic dad joke meets crazy cat lady: these jokes are the purrfect blend! Perfect for: Cat people of all ages Gift-giving for cat-loving family and friends Humor enthusiasts and anyone who loves puns and dumb joke books Fans of I Could Pee on This: And Other Poems by Cats, Oh. It's You.: Love Poems by Cats, and The Essential Compendium of Dad Jokes
The Little Book of Man United Legends
Dive into the rich history and legendary moments of Manchester United FC, a treasure trove of quotes and facts celebrating the iconic players and managers who have graced Old Trafford. One of the oldest and most popular football clubs in the world, Manchester United has been enormously successful, with beloved figures that have contributed to the club's success both on and off the pitch. This tiny tome is packed with the legends of Old Trafford, from Bobby Charlton to Ryan Giggs, Paul Scholes to Bill Foulkes, Wayne Rooney to David De Gea and so many more unforgettable names. Packed with quotes from the men themselves and their fans, plus trivia and facts, this captivating collection is a must-have for die-hard fans and anyone who admires the passion, skill, and dedication of the Red Devils, one of the world's greatest football clubs.
The Little Book of Liverpool Legends
One of the oldest and most popular football clubs in the world, Liverpool FC has been enormously successful. Throughout its long and glittery life, Liverpool has also signed some of the biggest talents (and personalities) in football. Filled with motivational musings and intriguing facts about the club's historic victories and record-breaking achievements, dive into the icons that have defined Liverpool FC's legacy, along with their contributions to the club's success and the lasting impact they've made on and off the pitch. This tiny tome is packed with the legends of Anfield, from Kenny Dalglish to Steven Gerrard, Ian Rush to Virgil van Dijk and Graeme Souness to Mo Salah. A treasure trove of quotes from the men themselves and their fans, plus trivia and facts, this is the ultimate celebration of the Reds, each word capturing the essence of what it means to be part of the Liverpool family, and above all, ensuring that you're never walking alone.
The Little Book of Arsenal Legends
Step into the rich history and legendary moments of one of the oldest and most popular football clubs in the world, Arsenal FC. This captivating collection of quotes and facts is a celebration of the iconic players and managers who have graced Highbury and the Emirates Stadium. Relive the wisdom, philosophical musings and reflections on brilliance and perseverance that have shaped the triumphs and unforgettable moments that have cemented the club's place in football history. This tiny tome is packed with the legends of the Emirates, from Thierry Henry to Tony Adams, Liam Brady to Dennis Bergkamp, David Seaman to Ian Wright and so many more Packed with quotes from the men themselves and their fans, plus trivia and facts, this is the ultimate celebration of the Gunners.
Pun and Games - 101 Clever Puns, One-Liners & Wordplay Jokes
Puns that are eggs-traordinary, un-burrito-ble, and just plain unbe-leaf-able.Pun and Games delivers 101 clever puns, one-liners, and snappy wordplay jokes, each brought to life with a hilarious cartoon-style illustration. These aren't your average dad jokes - they're smart, silly, and dangerously pun-derful.Inside you'll find: Puns with personality, from cheesy to charming to absurd.Funny, clean humor that's safe for work but still sharp enough to get a laugh.Delightful illustrations that turn every joke into a visual punchline.Perfect for: Gifting on Father's Day, birthdays, holidays, or white elephant parties.Light reading during coffee breaks, meetings, or bathroom breaks (we don't judge).Starting conversations, breaking awkward silences, or making your coworkers groan in despair.Whether you're a certified pun-addict or just someone who appreciates the fine art of bad jokes done well, Pun and Games is the laugh-out-loud book that proves humor doesn't have to be crude to be clever.Scroll up, click Buy Now, and let the puns begin!
Conversations With Dog
Conversations With DogCan dogs really sense ghosts, or are they just taking the piss? What is it about the 'W' word (walkies) that makes dogs go absolutely apeshit? Are there any canine attributes that would count as transferrable skills if a dog applied for a job? These, and other issues you never really gave a crap about, are addressed in this blatant cash-grab masquerading as a sequel to the mildly-popular Conversations With My Cat, as Chuck McKenzie discusses the complexities of life and leashes with the dog down the road. 'By equal measures utterly hilarious and terribly sad, ' is how the teller describes Chuck's bank balance, so please buy this book.A loose sequel to the bestselling Conversations With My Cat (Daft Notions, 2023), Conversations With Dog will give you all the insights into the lives and thoughts of our shaggy canine friends that you never really wanted to know about.
